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Waiter: "How do you like your steak, sir?" Sir: "Like winning an argument with my wife." Waiter: "Rare it is."
has 80.19 % from 80 votes. More jokes about: food, marriage, wife
I threw a ball for my dog... It's a bit extravagant I know, but it was his birthday and he looks great in a dinner jacket.
has 52.96 % from 98 votes. More jokes about: animal, birthday, dog, food
Teacher: Why are you crawling into class, John? Littly Johny: You said, "Don't anyone dare walk into my class late!"
has 77.06 % from 110 votes. More jokes about: little Johnny
A: What does "IDK" mean? B: I don't know. A: Ugh! Nobody does!
has 62.10 % from 109 votes. More jokes about: life
One night a Viking named Rudolph the Red was looking out the window when he said, "It's going to rain." His wife asked, "How do you know?" "Because Rudolph the Red knows rain, dear."
has 61.50 % from 81 votes. More jokes about: history
Two chess players were in a hotel lobby, bragging to each other about their recent victories. The manager comes over, "Could you go to your rooms now, please?" "Why?!" "I can't stand chess nuts boasting in an open foyer."
has 55.58 % from 54 votes. More jokes about: game
I walked in on my girlfriend having sex with her fitness trainer. Me: "Okay, this isn't working out."
has 74.97 % from 105 votes. More jokes about: love, sex, sport
My wife beamed at me with pride and said, "Wow! I never thought our son would go that far!" I said, "This trebuchet is amazing! Go get our daughter."
has 61.36 % from 60 votes. More jokes about: black humor, kids, wife
An artist asked the gallery owner if there had been any interest in his paintings on display at that time. "I have good news and bad news," the owner replied. "The good news is that a gentleman inquired about your work and wondered if it would appreciate in value after your death. When I told him it would, he bought all 15 of your paintings." "That's wonderful," the artist exclaimed. "What's the bad news?" "The guy was your doctor..."
has 85.16 % from 157 votes. More jokes about: black humor, death, doctor
A cop just knocked on my door and told me that my dogs were chasing people on bikes. My dogs don't even own bikes.
has 58.81 % from 78 votes. More jokes about: cop, dog

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