Q: What do you call two Asians playing basketball? A: Ping-Pong
Yo momma is so stupid she had to use her car key to open the front door just to get in.
A lawyer and a basketball player want to make a deal. Suggest a place where both of them would be happy to meet. Of course, they should at the court.
My wife just nudged me and said, "you weren't even listening, were you?". I thought, 'that's a strange way to start a conversation'.
A mouse and an elephant are walking through the forest. The elephant falls in a hole so the mouse gets his Porsche throws a rope down into the hole and pulls the elephant out. So they continue walking and the mouse falls into a hole. The elephant throws his dick into the hole and the mouse climbs out. Moral of the story: if you have a big enough dick you don't need a Porsche.
A daughter wakes up at 3 a.m. and asks her mother: "Mummy, tell me a fairy-tale." "Daddy will get back soon and he will tell both of us a fairy tale..."
Paddy and Murphy were doing a crossword. Paddy asks, "How do you spell paint"? Murphy replies, "What color?"
Chuck Norris can rotate text in MS Paint.
Q: What is another name for a gynecologist? A: A private investigator.
My blonde girlfriend went to the doctors this morning and was told she had two weeks to live. She chose last week and this week.
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