Q: When will scientists cure the common cold?
A: Actually, they already did but Republican pharmacists won't dispense it because they mistook it for birth control.
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Q: What do you call a Republican politician who hasn't been connected to a gay sex scandal?
A: Due.
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Q: How many Democrats does it take to clean up a disastrous Bush presidency?
A: At least two!
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Q: How big is a Republican-size bed?
A: Wide enough for the man, the woman, and the ten-foot pole.
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Q: How many Republicans does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: 200. Ten to attach the bulb to the sun, and 190 to make the sun revolve around the Earth.
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Donald Trump is a vain, arrogant, hateful pig.
That's why Americans voted him in - he's just like them.
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You don't think "The Simpsons" is all that funny, but you watch it because that Flanders fellow makes a lot of sense.
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Well goodnight everyone.
I have to get up early tomorrow to do nothing and still make more money than all of you!
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Q: Why didn't Republicans save any of the black New Orleans residents from the flooding of Hurricane Katrina?
A: They were busy trying to get two of each animal for their ark first and couldn't catch that damned roadrunner.
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A Liberal found a magic genie's lamp and rubbed it.
The genie said, "I will grant you one wish."
He said, "I wish I were smarter".
So the genie made him a Republican.
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