The best Santa jokes

Santa delivers to Chuck Norris' house first.
Vote: has 64.78 % from 14 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: Chuck Norris, Santa
What has antlers, pulls Father Christmas sleigh and is made of cement? I don't know. A reindeer. What about the cement? I just threw that in to make it hard.
Vote: has 64.78 % from 14 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal, Santa
Santa rides in a sleigh. What do elves ride in? Mini vans!
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More jokes about: car, elf, Santa, travel
Santa Claus arrives to a kindergarten and gives each child a present. Everybody received really cool presents – racing car models, ship models and similar. But one kid got only a pair of socks. A kid comes to him and teases him with his received brand new Formula 1 model and laughs at this socks-kid: LHey, what a shitty present you have received, look at my super car" said the kid offensively. "So what, at least I don't have cancer…"
Vote: has 63.75 % from 21 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: car, kids, Santa
Q: Why did the elves spell Christmas N-O-E? A: Because Santa had said, "No L!"
Vote: has 63.17 % from 17 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: Christmas, elf, Santa
Santa Clause doesn't watch you sleep but Chuck Norris does.
Vote: has 62.61 % from 13 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: Chuck Norris, Santa
Santa Claus goes to the mall to sit on Chuck Norris' lap.
Vote: has 62.50 % from 27 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: Chuck Norris, Santa
Santa leaves out cookies for Chuck Norris.
Vote: has 61.28 % from 16 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: Christmas, Chuck Norris, food, Santa
My dad was a complicated man. He was a huge racist, my dad, but he still tried to be a good father, you know? Like, he would tell me that Santa Claus was black — that way, when I found out he didn't exist, it wouldn't be that big a let down.
Vote: has 60.65 % from 44 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: black humor, black people, dad, racist, Santa
Q: Why does Santa have an accountant in the USA? A: So he can avoid Gift Taxes.
Vote: has 60.16 % from 12 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: accountant, geography, money, Santa, tax