Q: What do New Year's Parades have in common with Santa Claus? A: No one is awake to see either of them.
Santa writes to Chuck Norris about what he wants for Christmas.
Santa Claus asks Chuck Norris for presents.
If Santa comes down the chimney this year and tries to stuff you in his sack, don't worry, because I wished for you for Christmas.
Santa Clause, The Easter Bunny, and the Tooth Fairy were all real at one time... then they met Chuck. There can only be 1 living legend.
You know you're getting old when Santa starts looking younger.
Santa delivers to Chuck Norris' house first.
Yo mama so ugly when Santa came down the chimney he said ho! ho! hoooollly shit!
Q: Why did Santa's helper see the doctor? A: Because he had low "elf" esteem!
Santa Claus arrives to a kindergarten and gives each child a present. Everybody received really cool presents – racing car models, ship models and similar. But one kid got only a pair of socks. A kid comes to him and teases him with his received brand new Formula 1 model and laughs at this socks-kid: LHey, what a shitty present you have received, look at my super car" said the kid offensively. "So what, at least I don't have cancer…"