Santa writes to Chuck Norris about what he wants for Christmas.
Santa Claus asks Chuck Norris for presents.
Q: Why is Santa always so jolly when he comes to the UK? A: He can claim Gift Relief.
Santa Clause doesn't watch you sleep but Chuck Norris does.
This Christmas, Santa is sending a message to the naughty children to stop being bad. He stuffing their stocking with Chuck Norris!
You know you're getting old when Santa starts looking younger.
How does Santa's accountant value his sleigh? Net Present Value.
Yo mama so ugly when Santa came down the chimney he said ho! ho! hoooollly shit!
If Santa comes down the chimney this year and tries to stuff you in his sack, don't worry, because I wished for you for Christmas.
Santa Claus arrives to a kindergarten and gives each child a present. Everybody received really cool presents – racing car models, ship models and similar. But one kid got only a pair of socks. A kid comes to him and teases him with his received brand new Formula 1 model and laughs at this socks-kid: LHey, what a shitty present you have received, look at my super car" said the kid offensively. "So what, at least I don't have cancer…"