The best sex jokes

A businessman was flying on a plane surrounded by hundreds of kids. A lady went and sat down next to him. She asked, "Are these all your kids?" The man replied, "No, I just work at a condom factory, these are all the complaints".
Vote:
has 78.96 % from 137 votes. More jokes about: airplane, black humor, business, kids, sex
Q: Why do accountants make good lovers? A: They're great with figures.
Vote:
has 78.96 % from 828 votes. More jokes about: accountant, nerd, sex
Two men visit a prostitute. The first man goes into the bedroom. He comes out ten minutes later and says, ‘Heck. My wife is better than that.’ The second man goes in. He comes out ten minutes later and says, ‘You know? Your wife IS better.’
Vote:
has 78.95 % from 1153 votes. More jokes about: sex
A High School English Teacher reminds her class of tomorrow's final exam. She tells the class that there would be no excuse for not showing up, except for a serious injury or illness, or a death in the student's immediate family. One smart-ass jock in the back of the room asks, "What about extreme sexual exhaustion?" The entire class does its best to stifle their laughter and snickering. When silence is restored the teacher smiles sympathetically at the student, shakes her head, and sweetly says, "Not an excuse. You can use your other hand to write with."
Vote:
has 78.93 % from 2508 votes. More jokes about: death, family, school, sex, teacher
I could never fight a gay guy. I don't know how to start. "I'm gonna beat your ass... I mean I'm gonna f*ck you up... no, I mean I'm stick my foot so far up your ass.. no, not like that, I mean Fuck you, damn it, I give up
Vote:
has 78.79 % from 1159 votes. More jokes about: dirty, gay, sex
A woman walks into a chemist’s and asks if they sell extra-large condoms. ‘Yes, we do,’ says the sales assistant. ‘Would you like to buy some?’ ‘No thanks,’ replies the woman. ‘But if you don’t mind, I’ll wait here for someone who does.’
Vote:
has 78.72 % from 684 votes. More jokes about: sex
Why do Jews watch porn backwards? Because their favorite part is when the hooker gives the money back.
Vote:
has 78.72 % from 1885 votes. More jokes about: jewish, money, racist, sex
My 1st time having sex. I suddenly stopped and didn't move. She: "What are you doing?" Me: "I've seen this on YouPorn, it's called Buffering.
Vote:
has 78.69 % from 961 votes. More jokes about: dirty, sex
Q: What food diminishes a woman's sex drive by 90%? A: Her wedding cake.
Vote:
has 78.68 % from 1325 votes. More jokes about: food, marriage, sex, wedding
Once upon a time there was a women that was about to have triplets. In her stomach the babies were talking to each other. The first baby says "I want to be a plumber, because there is so much water in here". The second baby says "I want to be an electrician because it is so dark in here". And the last baby says "I want to be a hunter, because if that damn snake comes back in here i'm going to cut it off".
Vote:
has 78.65 % from 816 votes. More jokes about: kids, sex, women
<<<12131415
More jokes →
Page 12 of 88.