The best sex jokes

A man goes to the doctor for his annual check-up, and the doctor tells him, "You need to stop masturbating." The man asks, "Why?" The doctor replies, "Because I'm trying to examine you"
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has 79.23 % from 495 votes. More jokes about: sex
6 year old kid looking at Mom's ID card. Sex: F He laughs. Mom: "Whats so funny?" Kid: "I can't believe you're so bad in sex that you failed in it." Husband died laughing.
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has 79.22 % from 122 votes. More jokes about: family, kids, sex, wife
Baby, baby, baby ooh! Mom: *walks in* Are you listening to Justin Bieber? Daughter: No, I'm watching porn. Mom: Oh, thank goodness.
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has 79.10 % from 160 votes. More jokes about: life, music, sex
I could never fight a gay guy. I don't know how to start. "I'm gonna beat your ass... I mean I'm gonna f*ck you up... no, I mean I'm stick my foot so far up your ass.. no, not like that, I mean Fuck you, damn it, I give up
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has 79.02 % from 1067 votes. More jokes about: dirty, gay, sex
Kid to a pregnant girl at bus stop: "What are you expecting?" The girl says, "A bus." The kid turns to his friend and says: "Wow! I am 100% sure this chick got screwed by a Transformer!"
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has 79.00 % from 303 votes. More jokes about: baby, car, life, sex
A priest passed near a young boys gang that were hanging out next to the church. He went close to them and asked them: "What are you boys doing there?" "Not much, Father. We are playing a game in which however says the biggest lie about his sexual life, wins!" "Oh, boys!" surprised said the priest. "When I was your age I wasn’t even thinking about sex!" And the boys unanimously: "You won, Father!"
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has 78.95 % from 575 votes. More jokes about: age, church, life, priest, sex
A young man walks up and sits down at the bar. "What can I get you?" the bartender inquires. "I want 6 shots of Jagermeister," responds the young man. "6 shots?!? Are you celebrating something?" "Yeah, my first blowjob." "Well, in that case, let me give you a 7th on the house." "No offense, sir. But if 6 shots won't get rid of the taste, nothing will."
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has 78.95 % from 175 votes. More jokes about: alcohol, bar, bartender, gay, sex
A High School English Teacher reminds her class of tomorrow's final exam. She tells the class that there would be no excuse for not showing up, except for a serious injury or illness, or a death in the student's immediate family. One smart-ass jock in the back of the room asks, "What about extreme sexual exhaustion?" The entire class does its best to stifle their laughter and snickering. When silence is restored the teacher smiles sympathetically at the student, shakes her head, and sweetly says, "Not an excuse. You can use your other hand to write with."
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has 78.91 % from 2476 votes. More jokes about: death, family, school, sex, teacher
My 1st time having sex. I suddenly stopped and didn't move. She: "What are you doing?" Me: "I've seen this on YouPorn, it's called Buffering.
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has 78.90 % from 926 votes. More jokes about: dirty, sex
When I arrived at a hotel in order to fill in my identities I noticed the word "sex" so I wrote: YES PLEASE.
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has 78.87 % from 169 votes. More jokes about: communication, customer service, sex, travel
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