What do you call an elf who tells silly jokes?
A real Christmas Card!
A woman stopped by our customer-service desk and asked me for a copy of the book that has Jesus in it.
After much back-and-forth, I determined that she wanted the Bible.
After searching for a particular book on dinosaurs in the science section without luck, a customer looked to me for help.
She showed me a piece of paper with the title written on it: Thesaurus.
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You momma so stupid I see her walking the pigs down the street I'd asked "What she doing?" And she said "Going piggy back riding"!
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Yo Momma is so stupid when she asked me what kind of jeans am I wearing I said Guess and she said Levis.
Yo momma so stupid she bought a solar-powered flashlight!
Yo' Mama is so stupid, she's as useless as a screen door on a submarine.
A first grade teacher explains to her class that she is a Colorado Avalanche fan.
She asks her students to raise their hands if they are Avalanche fans too.
Not really knowing what an Avalanche fan is, but wanting to be liked by their teacher, their hands fly into the air.
There is, however, one exception.
A little girl has not gone along with the crowd.
The teacher asks her why she has decided to be different.
"Because I'm not an Avalanche fan," she retorts.
"Then," asks her teacher, "What are you?"
"I'm a proud Detroit Red Wings Fan," boasts the little girl.
The teacher is a little perturbed now, her face slightly red.
She asks the little girl why she is a Wings fan.
"Well, my Dad and Mom are Wings fans, so I'm a Wings fan too," she responds.
The teacher is now angry. "That’s no reason," she says loudly.
"What if your Mom was a moron and your Dad was an idiot.
What would you be then?"
"Oh," says the little girl.
"Well, then I'd be an Avalanche fan."
Your mama's so stupid when she saw a bus with lots of white kids in it she said stop that Twinkie.
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Yo mamma so stupid she puts a piece of paper on the TV and says, "I'm watching paper-view."
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Yo' Mama is so stupid, when she was pulled over for drunk driving and asked to walk a line, she said, "Which one?"