Q: How do we know Peter was a rich fisherman? AA By his net income.
Two junior doctors were involved in a fight in the hospital. A senior consultant had to pull them apart. "What's all this about?" asked the consultant angrily. "It's the Tax Inspector in C ward," said one. "He's only got 2 days to live." "He had to be told." said the second doctor. "I know," said the first, "but I wanted to be the one to tell him!"
Accountant after reading a nursery rhyme to his child,"No, son. It wouldn't be tax deductible when Little Bo Peep loses her sheep. But I like your thinking."
Q: How do tax accountants make a bold fashion statement? A: Wear their dark grey socks instead of the light grey.
Q: What is the definition of an extroverted tax accountant? A: Someone who stares at YOUR shoes when talking to you.
Q: And the difference between tax avoidance and tax evasion? A: Jail.
Q: What is Father Christmas's tax status? A: Elf-employed.
How many God-fearing, tax-paying, law-abiding men in Las Vegas does it take to light a bonfire? Both of them.
Did you hear about the cannibal Tax Accountant? She charges an arm and a leg.
The only sure things are Death and Taxes…and when Chuck Norris goes to work for the IRS, they'll be the same thing.