The best technology jokes

Q: How do you electrocute a blonde? A: Tell her to demonstrate the proper usage of an electric chair.
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More jokes about: blonde, technology
What We Learn From the Movies: It is always possible to park directly in front of any building you are visiting. A detective can only solve a case once he has been suspended from duty. If you start dancing in the street, everyone you bump into will know all the steps. Most laptops are powerful enough to override the communication systems of any invading alien civilization. It does not matter if you are heavily outnumbered in a fight involving martial arts, your enemies will wait patiently to attack you one by one, dancing around in a threatening manner until you have knocked out their predecessors. After a person suffers a massive blow to the head, they will still be surprisingly good looking. No one involved in a car chase, hijacking, explosion, volcanic eruption or alien invasion will ever go into shock. Partnering police officers with their total opposites will always, eventually, lead to buddy teams who share unbreakable bonds and gruff affection.
Vote: has 81.40 % from 37 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: car, cop, life, technology
Funny facts about Google users: 50% of people use Google well as a search engine. The rest 50% of them use it to check if their internet is connected
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More jokes about: computer, IT, technology
Google won't search for Chuck Norris because it knows you don't find Chuck Norris, he finds you.
Vote: has 80.83 % from 169 votes. Send joke:

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Q: How much does a hipster weigh? A: An instagram
Vote: has 80.35 % from 11 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: hipster, technology
Whoever said technology will replace paper has obviously never tried to wipe their butt with an iPad.
Vote: has 80.15 % from 841 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: Facebook, technology
Peter: "Your secretary is very sexy..." Tony: "Thanks! It's a robot actually, named 'Maria'. If you squeeze her right boob, she takes dictation & if you squeeze her left boob, she types letters! I'll Lend it to you for a day & you can see her functions..." Next day Peter called Tony from hospital & shouted: "You bastard!" You didn't tell me that the "HOLE" between Maria's legs is a pencil sharpener.
Vote: has 79.20 % from 995 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: hospital, sex, technology
Chuck Norris can make music in Adobe Photoshop.
Vote: has 78.80 % from 10 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: Chuck Norris, computer, music, technology
"Backspace key"... hiding feelings since ages.
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More jokes about: technology, time
How can you tell which one of your friends has the new iPhone 6 plus? Don't worry, they'll let you know.
Vote: has 77.23 % from 69 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: IT, phone, technology