The best technology jokes

Peter: "Your secretary is very sexy..." Tony: "Thanks! It's a robot actually, named 'Maria'. If you squeeze her right boob, she takes dictation & if you squeeze her left boob, she types letters! I'll Lend it to you for a day & you can see her functions..." Next day Peter called Tony from hospital & shouted: "You bastard!" You didn't tell me that the "HOLE" between Maria's legs is a pencil sharpener.
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has 80.03 % from 1216 votes. More jokes about: hospital, sex, technology
How can you tell which one of your friends has the new iPhone 6 plus? Don't worry, they'll let you know.
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has 79.73 % from 96 votes. More jokes about: IT, phone, technology
Autocorrect can kiss my ask!
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has 79.60 % from 53 votes. More jokes about: mean, technology, vulgar
When the office printer color started to look a little off the manager called the local repair shop. To the manager's surprise, the clerk said that it would cost $50 but that he might try reading the manual and doing it himself. The manager replied in astonishment, does your boss know that you discourage business that way? "Yes", replied the clerk. It was his idea. We make more on repairs than cleaning printers if the owner tries to do it himself first.
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has 79.35 % from 33 votes. More jokes about: management, money, office, technology
Yo momma is so fat when she walked by the TV i missed 3 episodes!
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has 79.08 % from 517 votes. More jokes about: fat, technology, Yo mama
I love the lines the men use to get us into bed: "Please, I'll only put it in for a minute." What am I...? A microwave?
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has 78.92 % from 45 votes. More jokes about: communication, love, men, technology, time
"Siri, why am I still single?" Siri activates front camera.
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has 77.03 % from 130 votes. More jokes about: insulting, single, technology, ugly
Me using the Siri app on my iPhone: Me: "Siri, call my wife." Siri: "Samantha McLaughlin is not in your contacts." Me: "Samantha Gibbs is my wife." Siri: "I've added Samantha Gibbs as your wife." Me: "Call my wife." Siri: "Which wife?"
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has 76.83 % from 73 votes. More jokes about: communication, phone, stupid, technology, wife
Warning! User Error. Kindly replace user and press a key to continue.
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has 76.80 % from 29 votes. More jokes about: geek, IT, technology
Anthony Weiner got in trouble with his Hispanic online name "Carlos Danger". He is now using a French online name, "Jacques Ouef".
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has 75.57 % from 64 votes. More jokes about: communication, ethnic, technology
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