90% of programmer errors come from data from other programmers.
A failure in a device will never appear until it has passed final inspection.
The math teacher saw that little Johnny wasn't paying attention in class. She called on him and said, "Johnny! What are 2 and 4 and 28 and 44?" Little Johnny quickly replied, "NBC, FOX, ESPN and the Cartoon Network!"
I put so much more effort into naming my first Wi-Fi than my first child.
How can you tell which one of your friends has the new iPhone 6 plus? Don't worry, they'll let you know.
Yo momma is so fat when she walked by the TV i missed 3 episodes!
Q: What's O. J. Simpson's Internet address? A: Slash, slash, backslash, slash, slash, escape.
Two young boys were spending the night at their grandparents the week before Christmas. At bedtime, the two boys knelt beside their beds to say their prayers when the youngest one began praying at the top of his lungs. "I PRAY FOR A NEW BICYCLE..." "I PRAY FOR A NEW NINTENDO..." "I PRAY FOR A NEW STEREO..." His older brother leaned over and nudged the younger brother and said, "Why are you shouting your prayers? God isn't deaf." To which the little brother replied, "No, but Grandma is!"
Why use Linux: No Windows, no Gates, no Bill to pay.
The biggest SEO problem with trampoline websites is the high user bounce rate!