Nothing beats a beautiful woman who can sing... except Chris Brown.
Warning ladies!
Never trust a man who calls you "SEXY".
This is why. When he removes the letter 'Y' it means you're down for "SEX". After sex, he will remove the letter "S" and start calling you his "EX".
Three boys are walking home from school and they see a naked woman.
One of them runs away the other two stay to watch.
The next day they are walking home from school and they see the naked woman again, and again the same boy runs away.
Another day later they are walking home and they see the naked woman again, as the boy tries to run away the other boys grab him and ask, "What are you gay or something don't you like looking at naked women?"
He replied, "Yeah, I love looking at naked women but my mom said that if I see one I'll turn into stone and I feel something starting to get hard."
A man and a woman are lying in bed, watching the ceiling and keep quiet.
What are they thinking?
The woman thinks, "He keeps quiet.
He doesn’t want to talk.
May be he’s get tired of me.
He doesn’t love me anymore.
He’s probably got someone else.
I see.
We’ll have to separate each other."
The man thinks, "A fly. A fly on the ceiling.
Wow!
How keep it there and don’t fall?"
I unfollowed Taylor Swift on Twitter...
I'm sure she's gonna write a song about it.
One day a women walks into work in a short skirt.
As she’s walking to her desk she gets stopped by a co-worker, who says,
“Your hair smells really nice today.”
She grimaces and stomps into her manager’s office.
She says,”I want to file a sexual harassment complaint!” and then relates what happened.
The manager says, “What’s wrong with him complimenting how your hair smells?”
Furious, she snarls, “He’s a midget!”
This guy comes back from the toilet, when a women says to him, "Hey, you have left your GARAGE door open"!"
As the man is zipping his fly up, he says with a big smile,"Did you see my big black hummer?"
The woman replies, "Nope just a MINI COOPER with two flat tires."
Did you ever notice:
Everything on a woman's upper body starts with a "B".
Blouse, Bra, Bikini, Boobs and lower body with a "P" Peticoat, panties, pussy...
That's origin of "BP"!
Vote:
Men are born between the legs of women and spend all their life trying to get back between them. Why?
Theres no place like home ...
I told my friend that she drew her eyebrows on too high.
She looked surprised.