The best jokes about women

Man to a woman: "Do you know the difference between a blowjob and a cheeseburger is?" Woman: "No." Man: "Lets have lunch sometime…"
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More jokes about: men, sex, women
Snooki is so short and orange that she works part time as a traffic cone.
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More jokes about: women, work
"Sorry sir, are these plastic flowers?" "As natural!" "What? They are natural?" "No, plastic!" "But, for Christ Sake, sir! Are they natural or plastic?" "Natural plastic!"
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More jokes about: god, women
Q: What's the similarity between a woman and dog poop? A: The older they get, the easier they are to pick up.
Vote: has 62.14 % from 30 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: age, disgusting, women
Have you heard about the new super-sensitive condoms? They hang around after the man leaves and talks to the woman.
Vote: has 61.94 % from 61 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: sex, women
A woman walks into a supermarket and buys: 1 bar of soap 1 toothbrush 1 tube of toothpaste 1 loaf of bread 1 pint of milk 1 single serving of cereal 1 single serving frozen dinner 1 can of Soup For One 1 16oz can of Miller Lite The guy at the checkout looks at her and says, "Single, are you?" The woman smiles sweetly and replies, "How did you guess?" He replies, “Because you’re ugly.”
Vote: has 61.63 % from 23 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: food, women
Dolly Parton and Queen Elizabeth went to the Pearly Gates on the same day. They both met with an Angel to find out if they would be admitted to Heaven. The angel said "Unfortunately, there’s only one space in Heaven today so I must decide which one of you will be admitted." The Angel asked Dolly if there was some particular reason why she should go to Heaven. Dolly took off her top and said, "Look at these, they’re the most perfect breasts God ever created and I’m sure it will please God to be able to see them every day, for eternity." The Angel thanked Dolly, and asked Her Majesty, Queen Elizabeth the same question. The Queen walked over to a toilet, pulled the lever and flushes it without saying a word. The Angel immediately said, "OK, your Majesty, you may go into Heaven." Dolly was outraged and asked, "What was that all about? I showed you two of God’s own perfect creations and you turned me down. She simply flushed a commode and she got admitted to Heaven! Would you explain that to me?" "Sorry, Dolly," said the Angel, "but even in Heaven, a royal flush beats a pair – no matter how big they are."
Vote: has 61.63 % from 23 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: celebrity, god, heaven, women
There were two church-going women gossiping in front of the store when a dusty old cowboy rode up. He tied up in front of the saloon, walked around behind his horse, lifted its tail and kissed the horse full on its rectum. Repulsed, one of the women asked, "That's disgusting, why did you do THAT?" To which the cowboy replied, "I've got chapped lips." Confused, the women continued, "Does that make them feel better?" "No, but it stops me from licking them!"
Vote: has 61.28 % from 16 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: church, cowboy, disgusting, horse, women
Q: What was the first word out of Adam's mouth when he first saw Eve? A: Whoa man! Thus, the word "woman" was created.
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More jokes about: bible, communication, men, women
Q: Why do horny women order at Subway? A: Footlongs.
Vote: has 61.25 % from 26 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: women