The best work jokes

A blonde returned home from work and was shocked to find her house ransacked and burglarized. She called the police immediately to report the crime. The police dispatcher broadcast the call on the channels and a K-9 unit patrolling nearby was the first to respond. As the K-9 officer approached the house with his dog on a leash, the blonde ran out onto the porch. The sight of the cop and his dog made her shudder. She put her face in her hands as she sat down on the steps and began moaning. "What's the moaning all about, ma'am?" asked the officer. The blonde replied, "I come home to find all my possessions stolen, so I call the police for help, and what do they do? They send me a blind policeman!"
Vote: has 61.71 % from 36 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal, blonde, cop, dog, work
Q: How do you kill an emo? A: You don't you let depression do the work.
Vote: has 61.63 % from 23 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: black humor, death, work
Happy Father's Day to the only person on the planet still willing to employ me.
Vote: has 61.28 % from 16 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: Fathers day, kids, work
A 21-year-old is hired by a hardware store. He shows up for his first day of work at 8 AM sharp. The boss welcomes him, then hands him a broom. "First, sweep out the store. Then I'll show you where the window cleaning equipment is." "Sir," the young man protests. "You can't be serious. I'm a college graduate." "Oh, sorry," says the manager, pointing to the broom. "No problem. I can show you how that thing works."
Vote: has 61.28 % from 16 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: graduation, insulting, management, work
A father went to take his daughter from school. While waiting, he heard her talking with a classmate of hers "I worry so much-..! My dad works 16 hours a day so he can build a dream house for when I grow up. My mom spends her days cooking for me, making deserts and tiding my room so I can have fun. I worry. I’m so worried!" "With that kind of parents you have nothing to worry about," her friend told her. "Yeah, but what if... What if they... What if they... ESCAPE?"
Vote: has 61.25 % from 26 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: dad, kids, school, work
Obama and his generals in the Pentagon discussed, and they could not agree on, what is the best time for the assault on Russia. Finally, they decide to ask the French: "When is it best to invade Russia?" The French answered: "We do not know, but certainly not in the winter, it would go wrong for sure." Therefore, it would probably be better to ask the Germans: "When is it best to invade Russia?" The Germans answer: "We do not know, but it certainly would not be in the summer. We have tried, already..." What to do? Someone proposes to ask China that is progressive and always comes up with a new idea. So they asked the Chinese, "When is the best time to invade Russia?" The Chinese replies: "Right now!" Russia began to build "The Strength of Siberia" pipeline, "Turkish stream", The Spaceport "Vostochny", The Bridge to the Crimea, and in the near future they will modernize the BAM, they are building new sports complexes for the World Cup in football and athletics, they are planning oil extraction in the Arctic... Right now they do need a lot of POW as work force.
Vote: has 61.01 % from 29 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: ethnic, political, war, winter, work
Where is the best place to hide a nigger's food stamps? Under his work boots.
Vote: has 60.85 % from 32 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: food, racist, work
How many civil servants does it take to set fire to Guy Fawkes on November 5th? Twenty, One to strike the match and nineteen to fill in the paper work.
Vote: has 60.56 % from 19 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: military, work
Q: What's grey has 6 legs, 2 arms and is twenty feet tall? A: A tax accountant riding an elephant.
Vote: has 60.56 % from 19 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: elephant, tax, work
Why was the horseman fired from his job of saddle testing? He was always standing up on the job!
Vote: has 60.16 % from 12 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal, work