The best work jokes

A lady was walking down the street to work and she saw a parrot on a perch in front of a pet store. The parrot said to her, "Hey lady, you are really ugly." Well, the lady is furious! She stormed past the store to her work. On the way home she saw the same parrot and it said to her, "Hey lady, you are really ugly." She was incredibly ticked now. The next day the same parrot again said to her, "Hey lady, you are really ugly." The lady was so ticked that she went into the store and said that she would sue the store and kill the bird. The store manager replied, "That's not good," and promised he wouldn't say it again. When the lady walked past the store that day after work the parrot called to her, "Hey lady." She paused and said, "Yes?" The bird said, "You know."
Vote:
has 58.75 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: animal, ugly, work
Yo mamma so stupid when she went to the library to get an application for a library card they said: "I need your ID" she gave them an EBT card.
Vote:
has 58.75 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: stupid, work, Yo mama
The email server is unable to verify your server connection. Your message has not been delivered. Please restart your computer and try sending again.
Vote:
has 58.75 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: communication, computer, mean, technology, work
The bank manager was in the final stages of hiring a cashier and was down to two final applicants - one of which would get the job. The first one interviewed was from a small college in upstate New York. A nice young man, but a bit timid. Then he called for the second man, "Jim Johnson!" Up stepped a burley young man who seemed quite sure of himself. "He looks like he can take care of any situation," thought the manager, and decided, there and then, to hire him. He turned to the first applicant and told him he could go and they would let him know.  Turning to Johnson, he said, "Now Jim, I like the way you carry yourself that's an important asset for the job as cashier. However, you must be precise. I noticed you did not fill out the place on the application where we asked your formal education." Jim looked a little confused so the manager said, "Where did you get your financial education?"  "Oh," replied Jim " at Yale." "That's very good, excellent. You're hired! Now that you're working for us, what do you prefer to be called?" Jim answered "I don't care. Yimi or Mr. Yonson."
Vote:
has 58.56 % from 21 votes. More jokes about: men, school, work
Q: Why didn't the dentist ask his secretary out? A: He was already taking out a tooth.
Vote:
has 58.56 % from 21 votes. More jokes about: dating, dentist, work
My boss is in the process of filling an open manager position. I asked him to please hire a man because women are crazy. He agreed with me. I got upset that he agreed. I'm pretty sure I unintentionally proved my point.
Vote:
has 58.56 % from 21 votes. More jokes about: communication, management, mean, women, work
A man works in the operations department of a large bank. Employees call him from the field when they have problems with their computers. One night a blonde woman from a branch bank called him and said, "I've got smoke coming from the back of my computer terminal. Do you guys have a fire downtown?"
Vote:
has 58.56 % from 21 votes. More jokes about: blonde, computer, stupid, technology, work
Little Johnny asks his mum, "Mum, do all fairy tales begin with 'Once upon a time in a faraway land'?"  "No darling," says his mother, somewhat distressed, "Sometimes, they can begin with 'I've got too much work in the office tonight, I'll come home later'."
Vote:
has 57.73 % from 35 votes. More jokes about: little Johnny, work
Why are niggers like sperm? Only 1 in a Million actually works.
Vote:
has 57.71 % from 420 votes. More jokes about: black people, racist, work
Q: What is long and black? A: An unemployment line
Vote:
has 57.55 % from 125 votes. More jokes about: black people, racist, work
<<<32333435
More jokes →
Page 32 of 42.