What kind of rings do men need for marriage?
Engagement Ring
Wedding Ring
Suffe-Ring
Endu-Ring
Wife complains husband,
"When I'm crossing the dark forest when I'm comming back home
I'm scared that someone will rape me."
"Don't worry" answers husband, "you wouldn't be so lucky..."
Why did the blonde have empty beer cans in her fridge?
For people who don't drink.
A gent is sitting alone at the bar in Caesers Palace.
A Jewish hooker comes over to him and asks him if he would like some company.
"How much, honey?"
"$800."
"800???"
"Are you crazy? Every other woman that came over wanted $400!"
The Jewish hooker thought about it for a second and then replied, "Ok, I’ll do it for $400, but I want you to know I’m not making anything on it!"
When Chuck Norris plays Monopoly, it changes the actual world economy.
Vote:
Q: What's the difference between Aeroflot and the Scud Missile ?
A: Aeroflot has killed more people.
This hillbilly is traveling across Texas when a state policeman pulls him over.
"You got any I.D.?" the patrolman asked."
"'Bout what?" the hillbilly replied.
The mouse and the elephant pas together over a bridge, very proud the mouse says:
Do you hear how the bridge vibrates under OUR footsteps?
Do you know why your mother is called Egypt?
Because every time she shits she leaves a pyramid...
A father and his son, Bobby, arrive at the local Rugby match and Dad can't find the tickets.
Dad: "Nip home and see if I left the tickets there."
Bobby: "No probs, Dad."
Half an hour later Bobby returns to his dad who is patiently waiting outside the stadium.
Bobby: "Yep, they're on the kitchen table where you left them."