They wanted something long and hard.....
I gave them MY HOMEWORK!
Mary Clancy goes up to Father O'Grady after his Sunday morning service, and she's in tears.
He says, "So what's bothering you, dear?"
She says, "Oh, Father, I've got terrible news. My husband passed away last night."
The priest says, "Oh, Mary, that's terrible! Tell me, Mary, did he have any last requests?"
She says, "That he did, Father..."
The priest says, "What did he ask, Mary?"
She says, "He said, "Please, Mary, put down that damn gun..."
Girl, do you need to get your protein macros up?
Because I'd gladly put my meat inside you.
An Indian and an African walk into a bar...
Just jokin'.
It's just two liberal white women.
Vote:
What do you call 1/4 of the black population on the moon?
problem
what do you call 1/2 of the black population on the moon?
problem
what do you call 3/4 of the black population on the moon?
problem
what do you call all of the blacks on the moon?
PROBLEM SOLVED!
Vote:
A teacher asked a student to write 55.
Student asked: How?
Teacher: Write 5 and beside it another 5!
The student wrote 5 and stopped.
Teacher: What are you waiting for?
Student: I don't know which side to write the other 5!
One goldfish to his tankmate: "If there's no God, who changes the water?"
Chuck Norris plays Scrabble with numbers.
And wins.
Vote:
Question: How is a woman like a laxative?
Answer: They both irritate the shit out of you.