Best jokes ever

What do u do when your sitting in the dark and your TV starts to float? You turn on the lights and shoot the black guy stealing it.
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has 48.06 % from 333 votes. More jokes about: black people, racist, technology
Why did the little Greek boy run away from home? He didn't like the way he was being reared.
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has 48.04 % from 113 votes. More jokes about: gay
What's better than 10 dead babies in 1 bag? 1 dead baby in 10 bags.
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has 48.04 % from 113 votes. More jokes about: black humor, dead baby, disgusting, morbid
Two friends were out drinking when suddenly one lurched backward off his barstool and lay motionless on the floor. ‘One thing about Jim,’ his buddy said to the bartender. ‘He knows when to stop.’
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has 48.02 % from 11 votes. More jokes about: alcohol
What goes stop, go, stop, go, stop, go? A blonde at a flashing red light!
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has 48.02 % from 11 votes. More jokes about: blonde
Money talks – all mine says is ‘Goodbye!’
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has 48.02 % from 11 votes. More jokes about: money
Yo' Mama is like ass hair: totally useless and full of sh*t.
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has 48.02 % from 11 votes. More jokes about: insulting, Yo mama
John was sitting outside his local pub one day, enjoying a quiet pint and generally feeling good about himself, when a nun suddenly appears at his table and starts decrying the evils of drink. "You should be ashamed of yourself young man! Drinking is a Sin! Alcohol is the blood of the devil!" Now John gets pretty annoyed about this, and goes on the offensive. "How do you know this, Sister?" "My Mother Superior told me so." "But have you ever had a drink yourself? How can you be sure that what you are saying is right?" "Don’t be ridiculous – of course I have never taken alcohol myself" "Then let me buy you a drink – if you still believe afterwards that it is evil I will give up drink for life" "How could I, a Nun, sit outside this public house drinking?!" "I’ll get the barman to put it in a teacup for you, then no one will ever know." The Nun reluctantly agrees, so John goes inside to the bar. "Another pint for me, and a triple vodka on the rocks", then he lowers his voice and says to the barman "and could you put the vodka in a teacup?" "Oh no! It’s not that Nun again is it?"
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has 48.02 % from 11 votes. More jokes about: alcohol
Q: What animal rotates at least 200 times after it dies? A: A rotisserie chicken.
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has 48.02 % from 11 votes. More jokes about: animal, death
A young blonde woman is distraught because she fears her husband is having an affair, so she goes to a gun shop and buys a handgun. The next day she comes home to find her husband in bed with a beautiful redhead. She grabs the gun and holds it to her own head. The husband jumps out of bed, begging and pleading with her not to shoot herself. Hysterically the blonde responds to the husband, ''Shut up...you're next!''
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has 48.02 % from 11 votes. More jokes about: blonde
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