The show Survivor had the original premise of putting people on an island with Chuck Norris.
there were no survivors and the pilot episode tape has been burned.
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There is the chief of Indians, and he is going down a field with his tribe, and they come across a pile of sh*t.So the chief asks his tribe men :
"Does this look like sh*t to you?"
"Yes is does", they replied.
"Smell it. Does it smell like sh*t to you", asks the Chief.
"Mmmmm..Yes"
"Feel it. Does it feel like sh*t to you?", says the Chief.
"Mmmmm..Yes"
"Lick it. Does it taste like sh*t to you?", inquires the Chief.
"Ammmm...Yes"
"Good. Don't step on it!"
When Chuck Norris visits Africa, the animals are required to stay in their cars.
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Q: What do spaghetti and blondes have in common?
A: They both wiggle when you eat them!
3 bums were outside a bar.
The first one went in and asked for a fork.
The second one went in and also asked for a fork.
Then the third one went in and wanted a straw.
At this point, the bartender became curious.
"How come all your friends want forks and you want a straw?"
"Well," the bum said, "the dog threw up and the chunks are all gone."
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Chuck Norris can turn on clapper lights by flexing.
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The Twilight Zone enters the Chuck Norris Zone.
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Chuck Norris Watches "the Nat.Geo. Specials" on Discovery Channel.
What's a rabbits favorite TV show?
Hoppy Days.
If a four-legged animal is a quadruped and a two-legged animal is a biped.
What's a tiger?
A stri-ped.