Best jokes ever

A blonde gets her first period, so she goes to the drugstore to get some pads. The wide selection and huge variety confuse her, so she asks the clerk for some help. "What kind of pads should I get?" she says. "This is all new to me." "Well," says the clerk, "that depends on the flow." She says, "It's ceramic tile."
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has 44.67 % from 38 votes. More jokes about: blonde, communication, stupid
Yo mama's lips are so big when you smile you wet your hair.
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has 44.67 % from 38 votes. More jokes about: disgusting, ugly, Yo mama
Chuck Norris doesn't use web standards as the web will conform to him.
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has 44.67 % from 38 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, coding, computer, internet, technology
No statement can catch the ChuckNorrisException.
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has 44.67 % from 38 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, coding, computer, geek, IT
First boy: "Are you having a party for your birthday?" Second boy: "No, I'm having a witch do." First boy: "What's a witch do?" Second boy: "She flies around on a broomstick casting spells."
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has 44.67 % from 38 votes. More jokes about: birthday, kids, party
The teacher asks a student "If you have $5 and billy takes $3, how much do you have left?" The student replies "Not enough for fucking lunch and billy ain't gonna have no got damn teeth left stealing my 3 dollars."
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has 44.67 % from 38 votes. More jokes about: math, money, student, teacher, vulgar
You ever accidentally go up to a real big fat person, and you accidentally ask them for a good place to eat? And they look at you and say they don't know. And you're looking at them, like, 'You do know. I bet if I follow you for an hour, we gonna be eatin'. '
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has 44.67 % from 38 votes. More jokes about: life
Man to vicar: ‘Do you approve of sex before marriage?’ Vicar: ‘Not if it delays the service.’
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has 44.67 % from 38 votes. More jokes about: sex
Fred came home from his first day at school. "Nothing exciting happened", he told his mother, "Except the teacher didn't know how to spell cat so I told her."
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has 44.67 % from 38 votes. More jokes about: cat, school, teacher
A girl came skipping home from school one day. "Mommy, Mommy," she yelled, "we were counting today, and all the other kids could only count to four, but I counted to 10. See? 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6,7, 8, 9, 10!" "Very good," said her mother. "Is it because I'm blonde, Mommy?" "Yes, it's because you're blonde," her mother replied. The next day, the girl came skipping home from school. "Mommy, Mommy," she yelled, "we were saying the alphabet today, and all the other kids could only say it to D, but I said it to G. See? A, B, C, D, E, F, G!" "Very good," said her mother. "Is it because I'm blonde, Mommy?" "Yes, pumpkin, it's because you're blonde." The next day the girl came skipping home from school. "Mommy, Mommy," she yelled, "we were in gym class today, and when we showered, all the other girls had flat chests, but I have these!" And she lifted her tank top to reveal a pair of 36Cs. "Very good," said her embarrassed mother. "Is it because I'm blonde, mommy?" "No, it's because you're 25."
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has 44.67 % from 38 votes. More jokes about: age, blonde, math, school
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