Chuck Norris has nicknames for his feet... Hiroshima and Nagasaki.
How does a cow do math? With a cowculator.
The First Law of Thermodynamics states: Matter cannot be created nor destroyed... unless it meets Chuck Norris.
Little Johnny took sex ed and every day when little Johnny would come in from school he'll tell his dad for learning sex ed well one day we'll just come in and he said that I got thrown out sex ed Lil Johnny's daddy says how do you get thrown out sex ed Little Johnny said well Dad I got in trouble for eating during class.
A Mexican and a nigga are riding in car. Who's driving? A cop!
Q: Why are black people getting stronger? A: TV's are getting heavier
What are the 3 things you cannot give a black guy? A fat lip, a black eye, or a job.
I stopped a girl in the street last night and handed her a rape alarm and some pepper spray. She looked confused and said, "What are these for?" I started unbuttoning my jeans and replied, "I like a challenge."
Chuck Norris and Mr. T walked into a bar. The bar was instantly destroyed, as that level of awesome cannot be contained in one building.
Well, you know what they say: unlucky in love, get the clap.