Best jokes ever

Student: "Sir, can I ask a question?" Teacher: "Yes!" Student: "How do you put an elephant inside a fridge?" Teacher: "I don't know." Student: "It's easy, you just open the fridge and put it in. I have another question!" Teacher: "Ok, ask." Student: "How to put a donkey inside the fridge?" Teacher: "It's easy, you just open the fridge and put it in." Student: "No sir, You just open the fridge take out the elephant and put it in." Teacher: "Ooh...ok!!" Student: "Let me ask another one. If all the animals went to the lion's birthday party, and one animal went missing which one would it be?" Teacher: "The lion of course! Because it wud eat all the animals." Student: "No sir, it is the donkey becoz it's still inside the fridge." Teacher: "Are you kidding me?" Student: "No sir, 1 last question." Teacher: "Ok!" Student: "If there's a river full of crocodiles and you wanted to cross, how would you?" Teacher: "There's no way, I would need a boat to cross." Student: "No sir, you just swim and cross it because all the animals went to the lion's birthday party..." Teacher: "I have my own question, if all the students come to school except one person, who is the person..." Student: "No idea sir..." Teacher: "It's you because you are on two weeks suspension."
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has 76.92 % from 294 votes. More jokes about: elephant, school, student, teacher
Q: How do you circumcise a redneck? A: You kick his sister in the jaw.
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has 76.91 % from 68 votes. More jokes about: family, mean, redneck
Three mischievous old Grannies were sitting on a bench outside a nursing home. When an old Grandpa walked by. And one of the old Grandmas yelled out saying, “We BET we can tell exactly how old you are.” The old man said, “There is no way you can guess it, you old fools.” One of the old Grandmas said, “Sure we can! Just drop your pants and under shorts and we can tell your exact age.” Embarrassed just a little, but anxious to prove they couldn’t do it, he dropped his drawers. The Grandmas asked him to first turn around a couple of times and to jump up and down several times. Then they all piped up and said, “You’re 87 years old!” Standing with his pants down around his ankles, the old gent asked, “How in the world did you guess?” Slapping their knees and grinning from ear to ear, the three old ladies happily yelled in unison… “We were at your birthday party yesterday!”
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has 76.89 % from 99 votes. More jokes about: age, birthday, nurse, old people, party
How do you know when a woman is about to say something smart? When she starts a sentence with, "A man once told me..."
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has 76.89 % from 23 votes. More jokes about: men, women
Drink water, let's surprise the liver!
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has 76.89 % from 23 votes. More jokes about: alcohol, drunk, health
Q: Why is it unwise to share your secrets with a clock? A: Time will tell.
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has 76.89 % from 23 votes. More jokes about: communication, time
Statistics say that women think they are smarter than men because they can fake orgasms. Men say "Big deal. We can fake a whole relationship just for a shag."
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has 76.89 % from 23 votes. More jokes about: men
Q: What's the best way of investing your money? A: Alcohol, where else do you get 40%?
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has 76.89 % from 23 votes. More jokes about: alcohol, money
What do you call twelve naked men sitting on each others shoulders? A scrotum pole!
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has 76.89 % from 23 votes. More jokes about: men
If you see me smiling, I'm probably thinking of doing something evil. If I'm laughing, I've already done it.
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has 76.89 % from 35 votes. More jokes about: life, mean
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