Best jokes ever

A blonde was swerving all over the road and driving very badly, so she got pulled over by a cop. The cop walked up to her window and asked, "Miss, why are you driving so recklessly?" The blonde said, "I'm sorry sir, but wherever I go, there's always a tree in front of me and I can't seem to get away from it!" The cop looked at her and said, "Lady, that's your air freshener!"
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has 77.06 % from 110 votes. More jokes about: blonde
Yo mama so poor she can't afford to pay attention!
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has 77.05 % from 587 votes. More jokes about: Yo mama
Will was trying to to teach his son the evils of alcohol. He put a worm in a glass of water & another in a glass of whiskey. The worm in the water lived while the one in the whiskey curled up & d*ed. "All right, son," Said Will, "what does that show you?" "Well dad, it shows that if you drink alcohol you will not have worms."
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has 77.05 % from 79 votes. More jokes about: alcohol, dad, kids
When I told the doctor about my loss of memory, he made me pay in advance.
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has 77.03 % from 41 votes. More jokes about: doctor, memory, money
Q: How many corporate attorneys does it take to change a light bulb? A: Who knows, you need 250 just to lobby for the research grant.
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has 77.03 % from 41 votes. More jokes about: business, lawyer, light bulb, money
This older Jewish man was on the operating table awaiting surgery and he insisted that his son, a renowned surgeon, perform the operation. As he was about to receive the anesthesia he asked to speak to his son. "Yes Dad, what is it?" "Don’t be nervous, son, do your best and just remember, if it doesn’t go well, if something happens to me… your mother is going to come and live with you and your wife…"
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has 77.03 % from 409 votes. More jokes about: age, dad, doctor, jewish, life
"Siri, why am I still single?" Siri activates front camera.
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has 77.03 % from 140 votes. More jokes about: insulting, single, technology, ugly
Q: What's the difference between a genealogist and a gynecologist? A: The genealogist checks the family tree and the gynecologist checks the family bush.
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has 77.02 % from 63 votes. More jokes about: dirty, doctor, family, work
The other day, my wife asked me to pass her lipstick but I accidentally passed her a glue stick. She still isn't talking to me.
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has 77.02 % from 63 votes. More jokes about: beauty, communication, mean, wife
One Sunday morning,a little girl and her mother go to church. Halfway through, the little girl tells her mother she's going to be sick. Her mother tells her to go in the bushes behind the church. The girl leaves and comes back after about five minutes. Her mother asks her if she threw up. "Yes," the girl says. "But I didn't have to go all the way "round the back. There was a box near the front door that said "For the Sick."
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has 77.02 % from 63 votes. More jokes about: kids
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