Best jokes ever

A gorilla was walking through the jungle when he came across a deer eating grass in a clearing. The gorilla roared, "Who is the king of the jungle?" and the deer replied, "Oh, you are, Master." The gorilla walked off pleased. Soon he came across a zebra drinking at a water hole. The gorilla roared, "Who is the king of the jungle?" The zebra replied, "Oh, you are, Master." The gorilla walked off pleased. Then he came across an elephant. "Who is the king of the jungle?" he roared. With that, the elephant threw the gorilla across a tree and jumped on him. The gorilla scraped himself up off the ground and said, "Okay, okay, there’s no need to get mad just because you don’t know the answer."
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has 73.13 % from 44 votes. More jokes about: animal
A man pulls up to the curb and asks the policeman, "Can I park here?" "No," says the cop. "What about all these other cars?" "They didn't ask!"
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has 73.13 % from 44 votes. More jokes about: cop
Q: Why is it difficult to find men who are sensitive, caring and good-looking? A: They already have boyfriends.
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has 73.13 % from 165 votes. More jokes about: men, relationship
In the supermarket was a man pushing a cart which contained a screaming, bellowing baby. The gentleman kept repeating softly, “Don’t get excited, Albert; don’t scream, Albert; don’t yell, Albert; keep calm, Albert.” A woman standing next to him said, “You certainly are to be commended for trying to soothe your son, Albert.” The man looked at her and said, “Lady, I’m Albert.”
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has 73.13 % from 106 votes. More jokes about: baby, kids
A client of a hospital where they made brain transplantations asked about the prices. The doctor said, "Well, this Ph.D. brain costs $10,000. This brain belonged to a NASA top scientist and costs $15,000. Here we have a policeman's brain as well. It costs $50,000." The client asked, "What? How's that possible?" The doctor replied, "You see, it's totally unused."
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has 73.13 % from 106 votes. More jokes about: cop, hospital, money
Q: What's the difference between driving in the fog and eating pussy? A: At least when you are eating pussy you can see the asshole in front of you.
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has 73.12 % from 436 votes. More jokes about: disgusting, sex
You mama is so fat when we went to the beach the whales sang, "We are family."
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has 73.12 % from 320 votes. More jokes about: animal, family, fat, Yo mama
Q. What do you do if a blond throws a pin at you? A. Run...she has a grenade in her mouth.
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has 73.12 % from 432 votes. More jokes about: blonde
Parallel lines have so much in common. It's a shame they'll never meet.
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has 73.12 % from 80 votes. More jokes about: geek, life, math, science
Chuck refers to himself in the fourth person.
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has 73.12 % from 123 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris
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