Best jokes ever

On the first day of the deer hunting season, a hunter fell out of a deer stand and broke both his legs. "Why couldn't this happen on my last day of hunting?!" the hunter cried to the doctor. "It did," the doctor replied.
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has 71.63 % from 37 votes. More jokes about: communication, doctor, hunting, mean, time
A woman in the bar says that she wants to have plastic surgery to enlarge her breasts. Her husband tells her, "Hey, you don't need surgery to do that. I know how to do it without surgery." The lady asks, "How do I do it without surgery?" "Just rub toilet paper between them." Startled the lady asks, "How does that make them bigger?" "I don't know, but it worked for your ass."
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has 71.63 % from 195 votes. More jokes about: alcohol, bar, husband
"If I could be someone for one day I would be Justin Beiber and run off a cliff"
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has 71.62 % from 96 votes. More jokes about: black humor, celebrity, music
Two monsters went to a Halloween party. Suddenly one said to the other, "A lady just rolled her eyes at me. What should I do?" The other monster replied, "Be a gentleman and roll them back to her."
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has 71.61 % from 140 votes. More jokes about: disgusting, flirt, Halloween, party
On a cold day of January, I went to visit one of my friends in his house; it was snowing and my friend urged me to stay the night with him. They had only 2 rooms one for themselves and other for their baby; so I suggested to rest in baby' room. In middle of the night, I need WC which was in the garden and was so difficult for me to go there. I thought some moments then decided to change my place with the baby. I did so. And pissed in the place of baby; when I returned to change again I saw that the baby had shitted in my bed!
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has 71.61 % from 329 votes. More jokes about: baby, disgusting, friendship, winter
Yo Momma is so fat… that when she wore a blue and green sweater,everyone thought she was Planet Earth.
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has 71.61 % from 100 votes. More jokes about: fat, Yo mama
You might be a redneck if you think taking a bubble bath starts with eating beans for dinner.
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has 71.59 % from 104 votes. More jokes about: disgusting, food, redneck
Yo mama's so fat, she's the reason why the universe is expanding.
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has 71.59 % from 132 votes. More jokes about: fat, insulting, science, Yo mama
A SQL query goes into a bar, walks up to two tables and asks, "Can I join you?"
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has 71.59 % from 132 votes. More jokes about: bar, IT, programmer
Sarah was reading a newspaper while her husband was engrossed in a magazine. Suddenly, she burst out laughing. "Listen to this," she said. "There's a classified ad here where a guy is offering to swap his wife for a season ticket to the stadium." "Hmmm," her husband said, not looking up from his magazine. Teasing him, Sarah said, "Would you swap me for a season ticket?" "Absolutely not," he said. "How sweet," Sarah said. "Tell me why not." "Season's more than half over", he said.
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has 71.59 % from 128 votes. More jokes about: sport
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