Best jokes ever

The old man had died. A wonderful funeral was in progress and the country preacher talked at length of the good traits of the deceased, what an honest man he was, and what a loving husband and kind father he was. Finally, the widow leaned over and whispered to one of her children, "Go up there and take a look in the coffin and make sure that's your pa in there."
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has 71.83 % from 109 votes. More jokes about: cat, death, fish, funeral, little Johnny
What is the similarities between a black girl, and a tornado? They both suck, blow, and leave you homeless!
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has 71.82 % from 585 votes. More jokes about: black people, racist, weather
What is the smallest hotel in the world? A p***y - because you gotta leave your bags outside!
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has 71.82 % from 113 votes. More jokes about: dirty, sex
Yo mama is so fat that when she asked, "Why is the grass always greener on the other side?" Everyone replied, "'Cause you aren't standing on it."
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has 71.81 % from 153 votes. More jokes about: communication, fat, insulting, Yo mama
Two girlfriends meet again after a few years. One is pushing around a baby buggy. The first girlfriend looks at the baby and is perplexed. "Black skin? Blue slit eyes? A blonde afro? How did you do that?" Murmurs the other woman. "Damn gangbang! At least he doesn't bark!"
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has 71.81 % from 117 votes. More jokes about: baby, dirty, racist, sex, time
This guy dies and his wife gets him cremated. She takes the ashes home and lays them out on the table and starts talking to them. "You know that fur coat you promised me? I bought it with the insurance money. You know the new car you promised me? I bought it with the insurance money." Then she whispers, "You know that blowjob I promised you? Well, here it comes..."
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has 71.80 % from 76 votes. More jokes about: car, death, dirty, money, wife
Knock, Knock Who is there? A long erected penis with an eye on my head and some wools in my feet. What do you want? Is there any body to suck me? I want to weep.
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has 71.80 % from 483 votes. More jokes about: dirty, knock-knock, sex
After a day fishing in the ocean a fisherman is walking from the pier carrying two lobsters in a bucket. He is approached by the Game Warden who asks him for his fishing license. The fisherman says to the warden, "I did not catch these lobsters, they are my pets. Everyday I come done to the water and whistle and these lobster jump out and I take them for a walk only to return them at the end of the day." The warden, not believing him, reminds him that it is illegal to fish without a license. The fisherman turns to the warden and says, "If you don't believe me then watch," as he throws the lobsters back into the water. The warden says, "Now whistle to your lobsters and show me that they will come out of the water." The fisherman turns to the warden and says, "What lobsters?"
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has 71.80 % from 137 votes. More jokes about: animal, cop, dirty, fish
Student: What’s infinity? Math Teacher: Think of a number. Student: Okay, I’ve got one. Teacher: Good. That’s not it.
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has 71.77 % from 407 votes. More jokes about: math
Yo mama is so fat that she could sell shade.
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has 71.77 % from 196 votes. More jokes about: fat, insulting, Yo mama
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