Best jokes ever

The Bible says I'll pay for my sins. I already do, Escorts, drugs and alcohol don't come free.
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Chuck Norris' yawn put people in comas.
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Chuck Norris doesn't breathe, he holds air hostage.
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Chuck Norris doesn't jump. He moves the ground away from him.
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When Chuck Norris steps on a crack he breaks another persons mother's back.
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The opening scene of the movie "Saving Private Ryan" is loosely based on games of dodge ball Chuck Norris played in second grade.
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When Chuck Norris calls 911 it's to ask if everything is ok.
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Q: Why do we paint Easter eggs? A: Because it's easier than trying to wallpaper them!
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Chuck Norris can piss into Gale force winds.
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Chuck Norris finished Minecraft.
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