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Your momma so ugly her face is used as an x ray in mortal kombat X.
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Every time Satain goes to sleep, He has to pray to God hoping Chuck Norris does't get him at night.
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Customer: "Waiter, what’s the meaning of this fly in my tea up?" Waiter: "I wouldn’t know sir, I’m a waiter, not a fortune teller."
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More jokes about: animal, food, life
Meteors didn't kill the dinosaurs, Chuck Norris just needed a new pair of boots.
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Daylight Savings happened when Chuck Norris overslept an hour.
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"Did you hear about the $3,000,000 Maryland State Lottery? The winner gets $3 a year for a million years."
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Chuck Norris is the only person able beat a fish at holding his breath under water.
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A six year old comes crying to his Mother because his little sister pulled his hair. "Don’t be angry," the Mother says, "Your little sister doesn’t realize that pulling hair hurts." A short while later, there’s more crying, and the Mother goes to investigate. This time the sister is bawling and her brother says… "Now she knows."
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Why does Chuck Norris have a beard? A better question is what will he do to you if you ask him?
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The reason the Holy Grail has never been recovered is because nobody is brave enough to ask Chuck Norris to give up his favourite coffee mug.
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