A car slows down at a stop sign and keeps driving.
A cop sees him and pulls him over.
The cop asks, "Why didn't you stop?"
The man says, "I slowed down."
The cop pulls out his nightstick and starts beating him.
"Now," the cop says, "do you want me to stop or slow down?"
Life may not be worth living, but what else can you do with it?
What's the difference between a black man and a daycare?
A daycare knows when it has children.
Q:What's black on top of white?
A: Rape
Q:What's white on top of black?
A: Society
When Chuck Norris falls in water, Chuck Norris doesn't get wet.
Water gets Chuck Norris.
Vote:
Two blondes were talking together:
First: "How about your engaged Jim? Is he keeping well?"
Second: "He isn't just now my engaged."
First: Hi good news. His nose was too big and his head was bald with an ugly face!"
Second: "He is now my husband!"
Vote:
Young Son: Is it true, Dad, I heard that in some parts of Africa a man doesn't know his wife until he marries her?
Dad: That happens in most countries, son.
Yo' Mama is so ghetto, her wedding cake was made of cornbread.
An aircraft is flying when all over sudden a bird crashes through the cockpit and kills both the pilot and co pilot.
Having heard the crash a blonde flight attendant rushes in to find out what happened.
Once inside the cockpit the plane jerks and the cabin door slams shut and can't be opened.
So she pulls the captain out of his seat and sits down, taking the radio into her hands and says,
"May Day! May Day! Help Me! Help Me! The pilots are dead and I don't know how to fly. Help Me! Please Help Me!"
She hears a voice over the radio saying:
"This is Air Traffic Control and I have you loud and clear. I will talk you through this and get you back on the ground. I've had a lot of experience with this kind of problem. Just take a deep breath. Everything will be fine! Now give me your height and position!"
"I'm 5'4 and in the front seat of the plane."
"O.K." says the voice on the radio. "Repeat after me: Our father who art in heaven..."
What did God say when he made the first black man?
"Damn, I burnt one."