Angry geek dad shouted to kid, "End of discussion; Semicolon;"
Chuck Norris built the never ending stairs. Then he climbed it up.
Chuck Norris can drink from an empty cup.
Q: What did the dentist say to the golfer? A: "You have a hole in one."
I got in trouble for telling a joke in 5th grade. Now I have to keep 250 feet away from all schools...
Q: How many divorce attorneys does it take to change a light bulb? A: It only takes one divorce attorney to change your light bulb to his light bulb.
Superman is weakened when exposed to Kryptonite. Chuck Norris eats Kryptonite for breakfast without even a belch.
Q: What is the difference between your cock, and your bonus? A: Your wife will always blow your bonus!
The Grimm Reaper lost his job the day Chuck Norris was born.
Yo mama so ugly when she auditioned for a horror movie they sent her to a professional!