Q: What is a computer's first sign of old age?
A: Loss of memory.
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If you think you have shitty job, what if you were toilet paper!
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Chuck Norris can blow the answers away from the wind.
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President George W. Bush decides it is time to do some public relations at a local Washington DC nursing home.
The President begins his "tour" down the main hallway and passes by a little old man who doesn't seem to notice him.
Sensing this, President Bush backtracks to the resident and asks, "Do you know who I am?"
The little old man looks up from his walker and says, "No, but if you go to the front desk, they will tell you your name."
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Q: What is a ghosts favorite snack?
A: Boo berries
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Q: Why was the condom flying through the air?
A: It got pissed off.
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Chuck Norris was banned from the Olympics because his mere presence is considered a performance-enhancing substance.
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I got a tattoo of Chuck Norris on my own leg... now it won't stop roundhouse kicking me in the face.
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It only rains twice a year in Seattle: August through April and May through July.
I would tell a joke about a bed, but it hasn't been made up yet.
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