Best jokes ever

The science teacher lecturing his class in biology said, “Now I’ll show you this frog in my pocket.” He then reached into his pocket and pulled out a chicken sandwich. He looked puzzled for a second, thought deeply, and said, “That’s funny. I distinctly remember eating my lunch.”
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has 62.69 % from 53 votes. More jokes about: school
A man with no legs is lying on the beach, when three attractive blondes approach him. The first blonde says to him "I bet you've never been hugged before." The legless man shakes his head. Then the second blonde says, "I bet you've never been kissed before." The legless man shakes his head again. Then the third blonde says, "I bet you've never been fucked before." The legless man says, "No." The third blonde replies, "Well you are now because the tide is coming in!"
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has 62.69 % from 53 votes. More jokes about: black humor
When the fire department catches fire, they call Chuck Norris.
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has 62.63 % from 37 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris
Chuck Norris can jump without leaving the ground.
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has 62.63 % from 37 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris
It gives me a solution to this whole inner city gang problem that we seem to be having. I just got to get some people behind me, right? I think we need about 20 or 25 grandmothers, give them all belts and do one big drive-by whupping on these kids.
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has 62.63 % from 37 votes. More jokes about: cop, kids
Bill Gates dies and goes to God. God says to him: Because you invented the screen saver I give you the possibility to go wherever you want. God shoes Bill that in hell there are lots of naked chicks and beaches. So he chooses hell. After a while God returns and asks him if he like’s it there. Bill says: No! Where are all the chicks you just showed me? Oh that! That was just a screen saver.
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has 62.63 % from 37 votes. More jokes about: god, IT
Do you remember how everyone was trying to kill Osama Bin Laden? Well, since all of our presidents seem to get shot, why we just didn't make Bin Laden president.
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has 62.63 % from 37 votes. More jokes about: black humor, death, political
Q: Why shouldn't Men using iron supplements take Viagra? A: It may cause them to spin around and point north.
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has 62.63 % from 37 votes. More jokes about: dirty, men, viagra
At a divorce court a family of bears is waiting for the judge to grant custody of little bear. The judge asks the baby bear, "Do you want to live with papa bear?" The baby bear replied, "No he beats me." The judge asked, so do you want to live with mommy bear! The baby bear said, "No she beats me too." The judge asked, "Then whom do you want to live with?" The baby bear says, "The Chicago bears, they don't beat anyone!"
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has 62.63 % from 37 votes. More jokes about: divorce, family, sport
2 Scientists walk into a bar, the bartender asks what they'll have. The first one says he'll have H2O. The second one said he'll have H2O too. The second one died.
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has 62.63 % from 37 votes. More jokes about: alcohol
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