2PAC once thought he was tougher than Chuck Norris... he was later murdered.
Chuck Norris can literally kill time.
Once you pop, you just can't stop. Unless you're Chuck Norris.
The tax advisor had just read the story of Cinderella to his four-year-old daughter for the first time. The little girl was fascinated by the story, especially the part where the pumpkin turns into a golden coach. Suddenly she piped up, "Daddy, when the pumpkin turned into a golden coach, would that be classed as income or a long-term capital gain?"
If Chuck Norris were an Adam's Apple, he'd be in your throat right now.
Your momma so fat... She's got smaller fat women orbiting around her.
When Chuck Norris is put in a straight jacket to be contained, he doesn't go insane, the jacket does. NOBODY tries to contain Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris's wish isn't your command, Chuck Norris's command is your wish...
"Killed it" is a figure of speech implying someone stopped the banter. To Chuck Norris that's just the motto of his life.
Chuck Norris was an only child. Eventually.