Teacher: How we use the light? Pupil: To suck it? Teacher: Why do you say so? Pupil: Because every night, my mother says to my father, "Switch off the light, I wanna suck it!"
What is the longest word in the English language? Smiles: there is a mile between the first and last letters!
What does it mean when you see a bunch of black men running in one direction? "A Jail break"
Two friends talk: "Hi, what are you doing?" "Not much, writing a Valentine's Day greeting card." "Why are you writing it with your left hand? Are you left-handed?" "No, I just can't let my right hand to see it. It's a surprise for it."
Your momma is just like a shotgun, give her a cock and she blows.
Yesterday my daughter was playing in the garden when I saw her kill a butterfly. So to teach her a lesson I said, "Just for that you don't get any butter for a month." Today in the kitchen she killed a cockroach. I said, "Nice try."
Yo' mama is so bald, when she wears a turtleneck it looks like a busted rubber.
A drunk man comes inside a bar and says, "Happy New Year everybody." and the waiter says, "We are in June you drunk man." And the drunk man says, "Oh my god my wife is going to kill me I have never been so late in my life!"
Remember the black guy from the Jetsons? Ain't the future great?
99 little bugs in the code, 99 bugs in the code, 1 bug fixed... Compile again, 100 little bugs in the code.