Best jokes ever

A quiet man, is a thinking man. A quiet woman, is usually mad.
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has 61.38 % from 124 votes. More jokes about: dirty, women
Q: What is the difference between a Harley and a Hoover? A: The location of the dirtbag.
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has 61.37 % from 63 votes. More jokes about: insulting, mean
Chuck Norris is so fast that when he runs, he can see his back.
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has 61.37 % from 63 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris
James Bond's license to kill was approved by Chuck Norris.
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has 61.37 % from 63 votes. More jokes about: celebrity, Chuck Norris, death
Thunder is caused by Chuck Norris rubbing the stubble on his chin.
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has 61.37 % from 63 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, weather
Q: Why was Tigger's head in the toilet? A: He was looking for pooh!
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has 61.37 % from 51 votes. More jokes about: animal
A nude guy was sunbathing at the beach, a little girl comes to him, he covers his private parts with a newspaper. The little girl asks, "hats under there?" So the man answers , "A bird..." The girl goes away & the man falls asleep. When he wakes up, he finds himself in a hospital & in alot of pain. A doctor comes up to his bed & asks, 'What happened?' The man answers, "I don't know. I was at the beach & fell asleep after talking to a little girl." So the doctor tells this to the Police, and they go to the beach to find any witnesses. When they got there, they see the little girl the man was talking about. So they ask her if she did anything to the man...? She answers, "I din't do anything to the man, but he was sleeping, I played with his bird, After a while, it spat at me, so i broke its neck, burnt its nest, and smashed all its eggs!"
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has 61.37 % from 51 votes. More jokes about: animal, cop, doctor, men
Yo momma so FAT, she can't save files bigger than 4 GB.
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has 61.37 % from 51 votes. More jokes about: computer, fat, insulting, IT, technology
For a weddin' present Ledbetter gave his son Amos two hundred dollars. Two weeks later he asked him, "W'atcha do with the money, son?" "Ah bought me a wristwatch, Pappy!" answered the boy. "Yew dumb ignoramous!" yelled his father. "Yew should 'av bought yourself a rifle!" "A rifle? What fer?" "Suppos'n one day yew cum home and find some guy sleepin' wid yore wife," explained the older redneck. "W'atcha gonna do? Wake him up and ask him what time it is?"
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has 61.37 % from 51 votes. More jokes about: money, redneck, time, wedding
A cop is staking out a bar for drunk drivers. At closing time, he sees a guy stumble out of the bar, trip on the curb, and fumble for his keys for five minutes. When he finally gets in, it takes him another five minutes to get the key in the ignition. Meanwhile, everybody else leaves the bar and drives off. When he finally pulls away, the cop is waiting for him, pulls him over, and gives him a Breathalyzer test. The test shows he has a blood alcohol level of 0.0. The cop says, "How is this possible?" The guy says,"Tonight I'm the designated decoy."
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has 61.37 % from 51 votes. More jokes about: alcohol, bar, cop
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