The Titanic didn't sink by an ice burg, Chuck Norris was doing the back stroke across the Atlantic.
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Chuck Norris can gargle with honey.
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Chuck Norris designed and created two series of cars.
These are now known as Autobots and Decepticons.
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The creation of a perfect sphere became possible after Chuck Norris became enraged with a rubix cube and roundhouse kicked the corners off it.
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It takes Chuck Norris 20 minutes to watch 60 Minutes.
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The last time Chuck Norris was hungry, all the dinosaurs suddenly got extinct...
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When Chuck Norris cuts onions, the onins cry.
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Chuck Norris had never escape from jail.
Jail escapes from Chuck Norris.
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You've heard that Chuck Norris counted to infinity twice, right?
Well he's currently making his third attempt.
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Chuck Norris walks into a bar, and as he enters, notices a horse and the end of the bar with a sign on it.
Out of curiosity, he approaches the bartender and asks what the deal is with the horse at the end of the bar.
The bartender tells him: "The sign says if you can make the horse laugh you'll win $50. Take note though that hundreds of people have tried and no-one has been able to do it."
"Get out the money," says Chuck," I'll be right back."
So he walks to the end of the bar, whispers something into the horse's ear, and within seconds the horse is laughing hysterically.
"That's amazing," said the bartender.
"Tell you what, if you can make him cry I'll double your winnings."
"Get out the money," says Chuck," I'll be right back."
So Chuck walked again over to the horse, came back to the bartender 2 minutes later, and the horse was balling and sobbing like a baby.
"Well," replied Chuck Norris, "First I told him a had a bigger d*ck than he did. Then I showed him."
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Wolverine has been called indestructible because of his adamantium skeleton... until Chuck Norris broke every bone in his body.
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