If a firefighters business can go up in smoke, and a plumbers business can go down the drain, can a hooker get layed off?
One attractive young businesswoman to another over lunch:
"My life is all math. I am trying to add to my income, subtract from my weight, divide my time, and avoid multiplying."
Chuck Norris can tap dance though a mine field... wearing clown shoes.
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Police Officer says "We'll never forget 9/11..."
In my mind: "I hope not It's your damn number!"
Did you hear about the Mexican train killer?
He had locomotives.
What's funnier than cancer?
Most things, really.
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Chuck Norris beat a laser beam in a race.
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Yo mama so old her drivers license in hieroglyphics.
"Between a rock and a hard place" refers to Chuck Norris' fists.
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Q: What is the difference between a blonde and the local football team?
A: The blonde has the higher sperm count.