Best jokes ever

Q: What's the idea of a blonde of natural childbirth? A: No make-up.
Vote:
has 62.14 % from 30 votes. More jokes about: baby, beauty, birthday, blonde
Two guys are fishing when one of them catches a fish. He brings it in the boat and as he cuts it open to clean it, a genie pops out and says, "Thanks for freeing me. I will grant you one wish." The fisherman looks around and says, "Well, we are almost out of beer, how about you turn this whole damn lake into beer". *POOF* the genie grants his wish and leaves. His partner slaps him on the chest and says, "What the hell did you do that for, now we have to piss in the boat!!"
Vote:
has 62.14 % from 30 votes. More jokes about: alcohol, beer, fish, genie
A couple of blonde men in a pickup truck drove into a lumberyard. One of the blonde men walked in the office and said, "We need some four-by-twos." The clerk said, "You mean two-by-fours, don't you?" The man said, "I'll go check," and went back to the truck. He returned a minute later and said, "Yeah, I meant two-by-fours." "All right. How long do you need them?" The customer paused for a minute and said, "I'd better go check." After a while, the customer returned to the office and said, "A long time. We're gonna build a house."
Vote:
has 62.14 % from 30 votes. More jokes about: blonde, life, time
Chuck Norris cannot only accelerate beyond the speed of light. He can also accelerate beyond the speed of dark.
Vote:
has 62.14 % from 30 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris
If you understand English, press 1. If you do not understand English, press 2.
Vote:
has 62.14 % from 30 votes. More jokes about: communication, customer service
Q: Did you hear about the leper poker game? A: One guy threw in his hand and the other three laughed their heads off.
Vote:
has 62.14 % from 30 votes. More jokes about: disgusting, game
A man is in a mall and sees a clothes store. He sees a magnificent, brand new jacket in the shop window and decides he shall try it on and buy it. So he walks into the shop and asks an employee: "Excuse me sir." "How can I help you" the employee replies. "Could I by any chance try on that jacket in your shop window?" The employee looks at him and says "No you shall not you are to try it on in the changing rooms like everybody else!"
Vote:
has 62.14 % from 30 votes. More jokes about: beauty, communication, customer service, men
You don't invite Chuck Norris. He invites himself.
Vote:
has 62.14 % from 30 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris
A man bought a new car. Next day he is driving his car to office. On the way he was waiting for the Signal. Suddenly he opened the door and got down. Then he went to the Traffic Police and asked him, "How much should I pay to turn right?" The Policeman was astonished and asked, "Why are you asking like this?" Then man showed him the sign board which was in the corner of the road: "Free Left Turn"
Vote:
has 62.14 % from 30 votes. More jokes about: men
A blonde was driving across several states to go visit her family. She was five hours late and her family was getting worried. When she finally got there she explained that she had seen 10 signs that said “CLEAN RESTROOMS AHEAD...”
Vote:
has 62.14 % from 30 votes. More jokes about: blonde
<<<579580581582
More jokes →
Page 579 of 1427.