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Chuck Norris can kill a man in 52 different ways using only a ballpoint pen.
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Chuck Norris is so strong, he can punch a hole through thin air.
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Chuck Norris once round house kicked a fat kid in the stomach and his foot print stayed their until the kid lost the weight.
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Will I ever be able to race my horse again the owner asked the vet. The vet replied, "You certainly will, and you ll probably beat her too!"
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Q: What do you call Santa Claus with muscles? A: Mr. XMass
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Did you hear about the aristocratic horse? He was the last of his race!
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Chuck Norris can sink a hole in none!
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When Chuck Norris was a kid he saw a fat chick, he roundhouse kicked her so hard she transformed. She is now known as Britney Spears.
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Yo' Mama is like marijuana everyone does her, but no one admits it.
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A woman walked into the kitchen to find her husband stalking a round with a fly swatter. "What are you doing?" she asked. "Hunting flies," He responded. "Oh, killing any?" She asked. "Yep, three males, two females," he replied. Intrigued, she asked, How can you tell? He responded, "Three were on a beer can, two were on the phone."
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