Q: Why do bunnies have soft sex?
A: They have cotton balls.
A man walks into a bar on the top floor of a skyscraper.
He sits down and orders a beer. After taking a drink he sees the guy next to him go over to the window and jump out!
"Holy cow! Did you see that!? That guy just jumped out the window!"
The bartender does nothing.
So the man takes another sip.
A minute later the same guy walks in, orders another drink, chugs it, and jumps out the window again.
"Jesus! He just jumped again!"
The bartender ignores the man. So the man sits puzzled.
The guy comes back into the bar, and orders another drink.
"How did you survive that jump?"
"I ordered a floatie drink, if you drink it in a certain amount of time, you can float."
So the guy quickly orders a floatie drink.
He takes it from the bartender, and chugs it.
He then jumps out the window and... SPLAT!
Right on the sidewalk!
The Bartender then says, "You know, Superman... you can be a real jerk when youre drunk."
Yo mamma is so fat when she went to the movie theater people said "Look at king Kong in 3D."
Sometimes I use really big words which I don't understand to make me seem more photosynthesis.
Vote:
I keep getting bills from the Memory Erasing Clinic but I've never been there.
Some people can ride their bikes with no handle bars.
But chuck norris can ride his handlebars with no bike.
Vote:
Yo mama is so fat she doesn't need the internet.
She is already world-wide!
Why don't men like to drink coffee at work?
It keeps them awake.
Yo' Mama is so nasty, she put ice down her pants to keep the crabs fresh.
Question: Why does Tigger smell?
Answer: You'd smell too if you played with Pooh all day!