Q: What does a blonde say when you ask her if her blinker is working? A: Yes. No. Yes. No. Yes. No. Yes. No. Yes. No.
No man can perfectly predict the weather, not even Chuck Norris. But the weather DOES try to predict what kind of day Chuck would like to have...
Q: What do you call a trial balance that doesn't balance? A: A late night.
A third old woman, full of happiness, asks her granddaughter; "My sweety, remind me please.. What’s the name of that German guy that blew my mind off...?" "Alzheimer, granny!"
Chuck Norris updates his DNA every 5 minutes.
Chuck Norris's favourite drink is diamond juice, which he squeezes out of raw diamonds with his bare hands.
Chuck Norris has only one friend on Facebook: Pain.
Q: What compliment do you NOT want from a midget? A: Wow! Your hair smells good!
Chuck Norris once made an omelette from a Fabergé egg.
What did the rabbit bride get on her wedding day? A forty-carrot wedding ring.