“Oh, I sure am glad to see you,” the little boy said to his grandmother (on his mother’s side). “Now Daddy will do the trick he’s been promising us.”
The grandmother was curious. “What trick is that?” she asked.
“He told Mommy that he’d climb the walls if you came to visit,” answered the boy.
Vote:
Question: What’s the difference between your paycheck and your penis?
Answer: You don’t have to beg a woman to blow your paycheck.
The hardest known subsatance in the universe is Chuck Norris's will.
Vote:
Q: What's the difference between Yo' Mama and a dartboard?
A: Yo' Mama's had more pricks.
Yo mama's like a library, she's open to the public.
Chuck Norris is so hot he makes the sun sweat.
Vote:
Yo' Mama's cooking is so bad, your family prays after they eat.
Blonde: "I'm on the road a lot, and my clients are complaining that they can never reach me."
Psychiatrist: "Don't you have a cell phone?"
Blonde: "They're too expensive, so I did the next best thing: I put a mailbox in my car."
Psychiatrist: "And do you receive any letters?"
Blonde: "No, but I figure it's because when I'm driving around, my zip code keeps changing."
Q: Two blondes are standing on top of the Empire State Building.
How can you tell which one is the true blonde and which one is the bleached blonde?
A: The bleached blonde isn't throwing bread crumbs at the helicopters!
Q: Why didn't go Noah fishing?
A: He only had two worms.