Best jokes ever

Q: Why do pandas like old movies? A: Because they are black and white.
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has 54.26 % from 13 votes. More jokes about: animal
For our daughters 5th birthday we bought her a rabbit. We couldn’t help laughing when on the way she announced "the rabbit’s name is Sparingly." "How do you know?" I asked "look" she responded "it says “feed sparingly 3 times daily."
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has 54.26 % from 13 votes. More jokes about: animal
Lady goes to her doc. "Doc, I have quite the problem. I can't control my gas. All day long I'm farting and farting. The only good news is they are the 'silent but deadly' type. The Doc pauses for a moment and replies, "first let's get you fitted for a hearing aid."
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has 54.26 % from 13 votes. More jokes about: women
Two protons walk into the bar and run into each other. One of them falls down. "Are you OK?" asks the other. "I think so," says the proton. "You sure?" the other asks. "Yeah," says the proton..."I'm positive."
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has 54.26 % from 13 votes. More jokes about: alcohol
What do you get if you cross a skunk and a balloon? A creature that stinks to high heaven.
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has 54.26 % from 13 votes. More jokes about: animal
Q: Why did Captain Kirk piss on the roof of the Enterprise? A: To boldly go where no man has gone before.
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has 54.26 % from 13 votes. More jokes about: celebrity, disgusting
The Matrix once had to take the red pill to escape from Chuck Norris. It failed. Nothing can escape from Chuck Norris.
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has 54.26 % from 13 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris
All employees are encouraged to stay with relatives and friends while on business travel. If weather permits, public areas such as parks should be used as temporary lodging sites. Bus terminals, train stations, and office lobbies may provide shelter in periods of inclement weather.
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has 54.26 % from 13 votes. More jokes about: travel, weather, work
Patient: "Doctor, I can’t sleep." Doctor: "Lie at of edge of your bed and you will sleep off."
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has 54.26 % from 13 votes. More jokes about: doctor, life
A man with a bad rash on his hands went to his doctor. The latter examined his hands carefully for sometime and consulted many large volumes on his shelves. Finally, he asked the patient: "Have you had this trouble before?" He answered: "Yes." Doctor said: "You have again got it."
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has 54.26 % from 13 votes. More jokes about: doctor, life
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