Best jokes ever

Old Farmer Peter was dying. The family was standing around his bed. With a low voice he said to his wife: "When I'm dead I want you to marry farmer Jones." Wife: "No, I can't marry anyone after you." Peter: "But I want you to." Wife: "But why?" Peter: "Jones once cheated me in a horse deal!"
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has 54.49 % from 45 votes. More jokes about: death, horse, marriage, wife
The judge asks the murderer: Why did you kill that old lady? For money.. But you got only 20 cents Yes, but killing five of them would already make a dollar.
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has 54.49 % from 45 votes. More jokes about: black humor
When Chuck Norris wants salad, he eats a vegetarian.
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has 54.49 % from 45 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, food
Q: Why was the Easter Bunny so upset? A: He was having a bad hare day!
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has 54.49 % from 45 votes. More jokes about: animal, easter
Did you hear Cher is joining the spice girls? They're going to call her Old Spice.
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has 54.49 % from 45 votes. More jokes about: age, dirty, music, old people
Q:What not to say to the nice policeman? A:I thought you had to be in relatively good physical condition to be a police officer.
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has 54.49 % from 45 votes. More jokes about: military
What is the difference between mayonnaise and semen? Mayonnaise doesn't shoot down your throat at 40 miles per hour.
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has 54.49 % from 45 votes. More jokes about: dirty, food
Chuck Norris doesn't mow his lawn, he dares his grass to grow.
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has 54.49 % from 45 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris
A man returns home and find his wife with his best friend. He takes out the gun and shoots his friend to death. His wife: "Listen, if you stay in such character, you will lose all your friends."
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has 54.49 % from 65 votes. More jokes about: death, friendship, marriage, wife
"My wife and I always compromise, I admit I'm wrong and she agrees with me."
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has 54.49 % from 65 votes. More jokes about: marriage, wife
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