Best jokes ever

A priest asks Johnny if he's scared of Satan. Little Johnny says "I have nothing to be scared of you are the one that must be scared; you talk crap about him every Sunday..."
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has 82.25 % from 183 votes. More jokes about: communication, little Johnny, priest, religious
Chuck Norris leaves messages before the beep.
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has 82.25 % from 266 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris
The Pope and Nancy Pelosi are on stage in front of a huge crowd. The Pope leaned towards Mrs. Pelosi and said, "Do you know that with one little wave of my hand I can make every person in this crowd go wild with joy? This joy will not be a momentary display, like that of your followers, but go deep into their hearts and for the rest of their lives whenever they speak of this day, they will rejoice!" Pelosi replied, "I seriously doubt that. With one little wave of your hand? Show me!" So the Pope slapped her.
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has 82.24 % from 137 votes. More jokes about: celebrity, life
A funeral service is held for a woman who just passed away. As the pallbearers carry the casket out, they accidentally bump into a wall. They hear a faint moan. They open the casket and find that the woman is actually alive. She lives for 10 more years and then dies. They have another funeral for her. At the end of the service, the pallbearers carry out the casket. As they are walking, the husband cries out, "Watch out for the wall!"
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has 82.23 % from 671 votes. More jokes about: black humor, death, funeral, husband, women
There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of animals Chuck Norris allows to live.
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has 82.22 % from 513 votes. More jokes about: animal, Chuck Norris
Superman was flying around Metropolis when he noticed Wonder Woman lying totally naked, spread-eagle on her bed. He thought, "Hmm... I could fly through that open window and be in and out before she even knew what hit her!" With nothing more than a rustle of the curtains, Superman was on his way, thinking, "Wow! She is really tight!" Back in her bedroom, Wonder Woman sat up asking, "What in Amazonia was that?!" The Invisible Man said, "I don't know, but my asshole sure hurts!"
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has 82.20 % from 54 votes. More jokes about: dirty, sex
Yo Mamas so stupid she was yelling into the mailbox. We ask her whats she doing and she said, she was sending a voice-mail.
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has 82.19 % from 8054 votes. More jokes about: insulting, Yo mama
Success is like pregnancy. Everybody congratulates you but nobody knows how many times you got fucked to achieve it.
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has 82.19 % from 309 votes. More jokes about: baby, dirty, life, sex, work
Little Johnny's teacher said, "Johnny, your essay on My Dog is exactly the same as your sister's." Did you copy hers?, she asked. Johnny replied, "No, teacher, it's the same dog!"
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has 82.19 % from 371 votes. More jokes about: animal, dog, little Johnny, teacher
Son - "Dad whats the difference between confident and confidential?" Dad - "Hmm. You are my son. Of that I am confident. Your friend Timmy is also my son. That's confidential."
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has 82.18 % from 227 votes. More jokes about: dad, family, life
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