Best jokes ever

Yo mama is so poor that your TV got 2 channels: ON and OFF.
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has 52.59 % from 55 votes. More jokes about: money, technology, Yo mama
Wife: Darling today is our anniversary, what should we do? Husband: Let us stand in silence for 2 minutes.
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has 52.59 % from 55 votes. More jokes about: anniversary, husband, marriage, wife
Some strangers sit at the bar. One guy says, "My name is Larry, and I am a SNAG." Another guy asks, "What's that?" The first guy says, "I am a Single, New Age Guy." Another guy says, "My name is Gary, and I am a DINK." A lady asks, "What's that?" He says, "Double Income, No Kids." The lady says, "That's nice. My name is Gertrude, and I am a WIFE." Larry asks, "A WIFE?" Gertrude says, "Wash, Iron, F**k, Etc."
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has 52.55 % from 104 votes. More jokes about: marriage
My girlfriend likes to pretend to be a 14 year old when we have sex. I don't get it she will be 14 in a few years anyway.
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has 52.52 % from 120 votes. More jokes about: sex
One day a family is wondering what to cook for dinner. They have many ideas but each idea doesn't sound good. Eventually, they go to the living room to watch tv when all of a sudden a knock at the door. The mother answers it and it's a nun saying she's going door to door giving out soup to families. She takes the bag of soup and thanks to the nun. They all go to the kitchen and grab a bowl and then pour the soup into bowls. The father says "this soup stinks!" The mother says "honey a nun brought it to us be grateful." The father then tastes it and says "ew it tastes like shit" and the mother say s "honey just keep eating." After they finish they go to the living room and the news is on. The reporter says "the man dressed as a nun delivering raw sewage door to door has been caught" they all puked.
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has 52.50 % from 38 votes. More jokes about: family, food, mean, religious, vulgar
Over breakfast one morning, a woman said to her husband, "I bet you don't know what day this is." "Of course I do," he irritatingly answered, going out the door to the office. At 11 AM, the doorbell rang, and when the woman opened the door, she was handed a bouquet of red roses. At 2 PM, a two pound box of her favorite chocolates arrived. Later, a boutique delivered a designer dress. The woman couldn't wait for her husband to come home. "First the flowers, then the chocolates, and then the dress!" she exclaimed. "I've never had a more wonderful ‘Independence day' in all my life!"
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has 52.50 % from 38 votes. More jokes about: food, husband, life, marriage, time
Q: What should you put on the tomb stone of a mathematician? A: He didn't count with this...
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has 52.50 % from 38 votes. More jokes about: math, nerd
Chuck Norris doesn't use a coffee maker, he puts the coffee beans in his mouth and boils them with his rage.
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has 52.50 % from 38 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, food
Insurance companies are trying to set new guidelines before approving Viagra coverage. What will they use to set those guidelines? A growth chart.
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has 52.50 % from 38 votes. More jokes about: dirty, money, viagra
Wife comes out of a beauty salon and asks husband: "So, how do I look?" "Well, at least you tried..."
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has 52.50 % from 38 votes. More jokes about: beauty, marriage, wife
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