Best jokes ever

What did Abe Lincoln say after a 3 day drunk? "I set WHO free?"
Vote: has 57.40 % from 178 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: black people, drunk
Yo mama so old her drivers license in hieroglyphics.
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More jokes about: age, car, insulting, Yo mama
Q: What do you call a blonde at a golf course? A: The 19th hole.
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More jokes about: blonde, dirty, golf
What happens when you stick your hand in a jar of jelly beans? The black ones steal your watch and rings.
Vote: has 57.38 % from 150 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: black people
Yo' Mama is so nasty, she put a cucumber in her panties and pulled out a pickle.
Vote: has 57.36 % from 11 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: food, insulting, Yo mama
Chuck norris can control chaos.
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More jokes about: Chuck Norris
Two Irishmen, Patrick Murphy and Shawn O'Brian grew up together and were lifelong friends. But alas, Patrick developed cancer, and was dying. While on his deathbed, Patrick called to his buddy, Shawn, "O'Brian, come 'ere. I 'ave a request for ye." Shawn walked to his friend's bedside and kneels. "Shawny ole boy, we've been friends all our lives, and now I'm leaving 'ere.I 'ave one last request fir ye to do." O'Brian burst into tears, "Anything Patrick, anything ye wish. It's done." "Well, under me bed is a box containing a bottle of the finest whiskey in all of Ireland. Bottled the year I was born it was. After I die, and they plant me in the ground, I want you to pour that fine whiskey over me grave so it might soak into me bones and I'll be able to enjoy it for all eternity." O'Brian was overcome by the beauty and in the true Irish spirit of his friend's request, he asked, "Aye, tis a fine thing you ask of me, and I will pour the whiskey. But, might I strain it through me kidneys first?"
Vote: has 57.36 % from 11 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: alcohol
If I wanted some comeback, I'd wipe it off your chin!
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More jokes about: disgusting
Lady goes to her doc. "Doc, I have quite the problem. I can't control my gas. All day long I'm farting and farting. The only good news is they are the 'silent but deadly' type. The Doc pauses for a moment and replies, "first let's get you fitted for a hearing aid."
Vote: has 57.36 % from 11 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: women
I could have been your daddy, but the line was too long.
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More jokes about: Yo mama


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