Chuck Norris once uppercut a horse and that is how the giraffe was created. 
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Once a cobra bit Chuck Norris.
After 5 days of extreme pain... the snake died.
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Fear of spiders is aracnaphobia, fear of tight spaces is chlaustraphobia, fear of Chuck Norris is called Logic
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There is no theory of evolution.
Just a list of animals Chuck Norris allows to live.
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Giraffes were invented when Chuck Norris laid an uppercut to a horse.
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You might kill two birds with one stone, but Chuck Norris kills two stones with one bird.
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Who do you think would win in a fight? Godzilla or King Kong
Neither, Chuck Norris doesn't let his pets fight!
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Chuck Norris can light ants on fire with a magnifying glass.
At Night.
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Chuck Norris doesn't scroll with a mouse.
He uses a lion.
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When Chuck Norris was a baby he didnt have teddy bears. He had real bears.
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Chuck norris once killed a bear with an imaginary knife.
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