Did you hear about the black guy that died on the highway?
He stuck his head out the window and his lips beat him to death.
Vote:
What’s the difference between erotic and kinky?
Erotic is using a feather.
Kinky is using the whole chicken.
A zebra has wondered his whole life whether he was a white zebra with black stripes or a black zebra with white stripes.
When he dies and goes to heaven he asks God the question "Am I a white zebra with black stripes or a black zebra with white stripes?"
God responds, "You are what you are"
The zebra goes to his friends and tells them what God had said and that he still doesn't know the answer to his question.
One of his friends says, "Well, that means you are a white zebra with black stripes"
The zebra asks him why and the friend says, "Because otherwise God would have said 'You is what you is'"
Q: What's the difference between an NFL player and an elevator?
A: The elevator can raise a child.
The Dead Sea was once alive before Chuck Norris bathed there.
Vote:
Q: Two black guys decide to jump off a building; who lands first?
A: Who cares?
Vote:
She’s got her very own method of birth control.
She takes her make-up off.
Chuck Norris does not hunt because the word hunting infers the probability of failure.
Chuck Norris goes killing.
Vote:
A grasshopper walks into a bar and the bartender says, 'Hey, we have a drink named after you!'
The grasshopper looks surprised and says, 'You have a drink named Steve?'
Three statisticians go out hunting together.
After a while they spot a solitary rabbit.
The first statistician takes aim and overshoots.
The second aims and undershoots.
The third shouts out "We got him!"