Best jokes ever

Yo' Mama is so fat, she has a kickstand on her peg leg.

Chuck Norris inhales carbon monoxide and exhales oxygen.

Yo Mama so old... She used to gang bang with the Flintstones.

Yo' Mama is so nasty, her flyswatter doubles as a spatula.

A Polish man moved to the USA and married an American girl. Although his English was far from perfect, and they got along very well. One day he rushed into a lawyer’s office and asked him if he could arrange a divorce for him. The lawyer said that getting a divorce would depend on the circumstances, and asked him the following questions: "Have you any grounds?" "Yes, an acre and half and nice little home." "No, I mean what is the foundation of this case?" "It made of concrete." "I don’t think you understand. Does either of you have a real grudge?" "No, we have carport, and not need one." "I mean. What are your relations like?" "All my relations still in Poland." "Is there any infidelity in your marriage?" "We have hi-fidelity stereo and good DVD player." "Does your wife beat you up?" "No, I always up before her." "Is your wife a nagger?" "No, she white." "Why do you want this divorce?" "She going to kill me." "What makes you think that?" "I got proof." "What kind of proof?" "She going to poison me. She buy a bottle at drugstore and put on shelf in bathroom." "I can read, and it say: 'Polish Remover.'"

Q: What is white at the top and black at the bottom? A: Society!

Q: If a man crashes his car into a woman who's fault is it? A: Well what was the man doing driving in the kitchen...

Me - Can you go to your moms room? Friend - Yeah, why? Me - I left my pants in there. Friend - Fuck you!

Q. Did you hear they came out with a new lesbian shoe? A. They're called Dikes. They have an extra long tongue and only take one finger to get off!

Q: How does an English man know that his wife has died? A: Sex is still the same but the dishes are stacked in the sink.