Q: What do you call a group of 8 hobbits A: Hobbyte.
Kanye West interupted Chuck Norris and became Kanye East.
How do you f*ck a fat chick? Roll her in flour and find the wet spot.
Chuck Norris is so awesome, he can dodge rain.
My eyelids are so sexy, I can't keep my eyes off them.
What did the 0 say to the 8? Nice belt!
Why don’t women blink during foreplay? They don’t have time.
How did the Vikings send secret messages? By norse code! Why did the knight run about shouting for a tin opneder? He had a bee in his suit of armour! Teacher: Who can tell me where Hadrians Wall is? Pupil: I expect it’s around Hadrian’s garden miss! Why were the early days of history called the dark ages? Because there were so many knights!
Before marriage, a man will lie awake all night thinking about something you say. After marriage, he will fall asleep before you finish. Happy Valentine's Day.
Q: How do you make a dog go ‘miaow’? A: Freeze it in liquid nitrogen, and run it through a bandsaw…