Best jokes ever

Q:What did the bartender say after a book walked into the bar? A:"Please, no stories!"
Vote: has 54.15 % from 24 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: alcohol
Walking down the street, a man hears a voice: "Stop! If you take one more step, a brick will fall down and kill you." The man stopped; a big brick fell in front of him. The astonished man continued walking to the cross walk. The voice shouted, "Stop! If you take one more step, a car will run over you and you will die." The man stood still; a car came careening around the corner, barely missing him. "Where are you?" the man asked. "Who are you?" "I am your guardian angel," the voice answered. "Oh yeah?" the man asked. "Where the hell were you when I got married last week?"
Vote: has 54.15 % from 181 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: car, death, marriage
What has 4 legs and one arm? A Doberman in a children’s playground!
Vote: has 54.14 % from 62 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: disgusting
‘During sex, my girlfriend always wants to talk to me. Just the other night she called me from a hotel.’ Rodney Dangerfield
Vote: has 54.14 % from 62 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: sex
Teacher: Daddy, have you ever been to Egypt? Father: No. Why do you ask that? Teacher: Well, where did you get THIS mummy then?
Vote: has 54.13 % from 37 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: dad, school, teacher
What happens if you download the Princess Diana screensaver application? Your iphone will keep crashing!
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More jokes about: celebrity, dirty, IT, phone
What is the geographical definition of s*x? Ans: It is an action done by the polland in the holland between the thailand with the little help of greece.
Vote: has 54.13 % from 37 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: dirty
How many blonde does it take to change a lightbulb? A: 3. One to hold the lightbulb and two to turn the ladder.
Vote: has 54.13 % from 37 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: blonde, light bulb
Anyone remember the good old days before Facebook, Instagram and Twitter? When you had to take a photo of your dinner, then get the film developed, then go around to all your friends' houses to show them the picture of your dinner? No? Me neither.
Vote: has 54.09 % from 413 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: Facebook, technology
Viagra is like Disneyland; a one hour wait for a 2-minute ride.
Vote: has 54.09 % from 57 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: sex, time, viagra


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