What is something nine out of ten people enjoy?
Gang rape.
Wife and husband have bought condoms with different flavours.
Darling, I will turn off the light, put one on and you guess the flavour.
As soon as he turns off the light, she takes it in the mouth and says:
Gorgonzola!
Wait, it is not on yet.
Why did the black guy cross the road?
Who the fuck cares, why is he out of the cotton field?
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Q: What's the difference between your wife and your job?
A: After 10 years the job still sucks.
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A cat died and went to heaven. St. Peter said to the cat, "Is there anything I can do to make your stay here better?"
The cat said, "I've been sleeping on a cold floor and I'd love a warm pillow to sleep on.
St. Peter gave a pillow to the cat, and the cat headed off to bed.
Later, some mice came to St. Peter. They wanted roller skates to get around faster so St. Peter gave them their skates and the mice went off.
The next evening St. Peter checks in on the cat. "How was your night last night?"
The cat said "That pillow you gave me is really nice, but what I like the most about heaven is the Meals on Wheels."
If we were both squirrels, would you let me bust a nut in your hole?
Men, don’t buy expensive ‘ribbed’ condoms; buy an ordinary one and slip in a handful of frozen peas.
Q. Which famous celebrity has had the most children over the last 10 years?
A. Michael Jackson
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We have so many nationalities.
It's gotten to the point now that you can go into any fast food place, and you can find out what kind of neighborhood you're in just by the ethnic group that works there.
It's like, if Chinese people work there, you're in a Chinese neighborhood; if black people work there, you're in a black neighborhood; if white people work there, then you're in Utah.
Chuck Norris protects his airbag in an accident.
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