Q: What's the difference between Auschwitz and Sarajevo?
A: At least they had gas in Auschwitz.
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The first time Chuck Norris won a game of poker was when his apponant reaveled his full house; then Chuck Norris reaveled his roundhouse.
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A bear and a rabbit are taking a shit in the woods, finally the bear says, "excuse me ,do you have problems with crap sticking to your furr when you go?"
The rabbit replies, "WHY NO".....so then the bear wiped his ass with the rabbit.
A woman walks into a bar with her 5 pound Chihuahua and sits down next to this guy, whom she notices is feeling a little bit queasy.
A few minutes go buy and the guy looks at her and blows his chunks.
He looks down and sees the little dog struggling in a pool of vomit and says, "Whoa, I don't remember eating that!"
To give you an idea of the kind of season we've had, the person who handled our side of the scoreboard was sick for three weeks and nobody noticed.
What do you call a blonde between two brunettes?
A mental block.
Q: How many jews can you fit in a VW Beetle?
A: 54, two in the front, two in the back, and fifty in the ashtray.
Some people break the laws of the state, Chuck Norris breaks the laws of physics.
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The world won't end in 2012, it will end when Chuck Norris gets bored of it.
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What is a black persons's worst fear?
Child Support.