Women are like parking spaces, normally all the good ones are taken.
So, occasionally, when no one's looking, you have to stick it in a disabled one.
Chuck Norris lit a match and ended the Cold War.
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Messing with Chuck Norris is the only thing that will get you disqualified from a Colonial Penn Life Insurance policy - at any age.
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Chuck Norris is the ultimate hide and seek player; no one dares find him.
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Q: What do Blondes say after sex?
A1: Thanks Guys.
A2: Are you boys all in the same band?
A3: Do you guys all play for the Green Bay Packers?
Yo mama breath stanks so bad, instead of using baking soda, it smells like she uses baking ass!
When I was young I had my first induction day in IT we were making an animation on scratch me and my friend decided to go on our phones.
The teacher came over and asked, "what we were doing on our phones."
I had to think fast so I said "we were researching something" she said that was alright.
Still, to this day I wonder why she didn't notice that we had computers in front of us that had the school wifi.
Chuck Norris ate once at Hard Rock Cafe.
It's now called Shakey's.
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Chuck Norris caught them all with one PokeBall.
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What's the warmest organ in a dead woman's body?
My dick.
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