How do you get a blonde to drown? Put a scratch and sniff on the showerhead.
Q: Why is it good to have a blonde passenger? A: You can park in the handicap zone.
My mother-in-law fell down a wishing well, I was amazed, I never knew they worked.
Where did the mooron take the baby cow to eat? To the calf-ateria.
One roomate said to another, “Man, this morning I woke up with white crud around my mouth!” The other roomate said, “Oh, that's my fault, I guess I missed!”
Chuck Norris is the most feared predator on the planet. That's why sharks have a Chuck Norris week.
Chuck Norris can hear your text messages.
Unicorns are extinct but Chuck Norris used all their horns as toothpicks.
Yo' Mama is so stupid, she called the police to report a suspicious looking person lurking in her mirror.
Your mama's so stupid she tripped over a line on a basketball court.